


Trapped

by LexisRage



Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: Emotional Instability, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Multiple Personalities
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-12-01
Updated: 2015-02-04
Packaged: 2018-01-03 04:28:05
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 7
Words: 23,449
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1065758
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LexisRage/pseuds/LexisRage
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>For three years, Sora has been held in a dungeon bedroom, raped and mistreated by a man who will stop at nothing for his lover to return. When thin tensions finally snap, will Axel destroy them both, or will they learn to rebuild? How far will either of them go to learn to love again, and what happens when it's just not that easy? Set in the middle of KH2.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Begining of the End

**Author's Note:**

> This is a story I've been working on for a while, an idea that just popped into the back of my head and screamed to be put on paper. Please review so I know whether or not to continue!

 

People always tell you life isn't too hard. People always say things to cheer you up when everything's going wrong; they tell you that everything will be alright, even if it won't. When life hands you proverbial lemons, People tell you to make Lemonade. Well... People are wrong. When life hands you lemons, life just wants to shove them up your ass in the worst way possible.

'... Bad analogy...' Sora thought, giving a soft sigh through marginally parted lips, lifting his left hand, only to bring it around his body to his hindquarters, which lay slightly slanted upward on the bed. Pain throbbed in his ass in the most horrible way he could ever have imagined, and then some. Tears had dried upon Sora's face from earlier that evening, and yet, even as Sora thought back to the happenings of before, he couldn't find it in his heart to cry any more tears. He was all cried out. Laying on his stomach, his knees slightly pulled up underneath him to keep the rug burn on his lower belly from touching the bed spread and burning more, and his head twisted to the side, brunette locks cascading over his pale facial features, which had lost their spikiness and luster held all those years ago, Sora sighed again.

He had become naught but a sex toy. It was hard to imagine how exactly his life had changed so drastically, especially when he had so many friends, so many dreams, and accomplishments and Purpose.

" How the mighty have fallen... " Axel had told him, right before he was locked away. Sora had made a mental note of the things said to him that fateful night, and locked the comment away, deep inside his brain, always pondering, never to be forgotten...

" If you won't let me see Roxas, I'll just have to take Roxas from You! "

Axel had then proceeded to somehow bind Sora's wrists behind his back; with what, Sora hadn't known at the time, though it had felt like something cotton. He had then shoved him down on his knees, and then even further, so that his head was crushed into the ground, and Sora had to quickly turn his cheek, so the motion wouldn't break his nose upon impact. Sora could remember with great detail and feeling, the way Axel had all but ripped off Sora's trousers, and underwear... and how probing fingers found...

Sora's breath hitched. Bringing himself out of the memory, he was half shocked, and half tearful once more, to find that the hand he'd brought around to caress his pained ass, had begun the same decent that Axel's hand had so many times. His index and middle digits were oh so gently probing around his entrance, causing that puckered hole of his to flinch and contract a few times. Just like it had before... His body seemed to shift of it's own violation, his fingers starting to sink into the un-lubricated hole, not without a flash of pain, but one that seemed to also come with a flair of pleasure that sent his heartbeat flying and his cheeks to colour crimson. His hips rolled back to meet the motion of his fingers, like he'd been all but taught to do with Axel... and he could feel himself responding again.

It was... shameful. Disgusting. Unpure. Sinful. Horrible. Unacceptable. And yet... even after three years... his body seemed to want more.

More.

_" More! " Sora panted, unable to catch his breath, caught in a myrad of pleasurable and painful sensations, as Axel thrusted himself deep within the younger's body. Sora's knees hurt from the hard, stone floor he'd been thrown down on, and his wrists were starting to burn with all the twisting and turning and pulling and yanking that Sora was doing, trying to free them, or at least get them into a better position. But Axel just kept ramming away, the slap of his balls hitting Sora's own and causing him to jolt forwards each time._

_He couldn't keep himself quiet, and with each panted breath came a high pitched moan. His cheeks were perfectly scarlet by now, but his body didn't seem to register what his brain was screaming out at him, about how wrong this was. It seemed to move with a will of it's own, pushing back against Axel's stiff heat, slick with what had to be blood from inside Sora. But it didn't seem to make a difference to Sora's body. More moans poured from his widely parted, dry lips, a small trail of drool leading from the corner of his mouth down to the cold, unforgiving floor beneath as Sora could feel himself being brought closer to the edge by nothing more than Axel thrusting deeper and deeper and -_

_Bright lights exploded just behind Sora's eyeballs. Axel had switched positions just slightly, thrusting harder into Sora's upturned, naked ass, but it was as though he was hitting a pleasure button just on the inside of him, making his entire insides turn to molten lava. Sora heard himself scream, but he didn't realize he was screaming until halfway through it, when his throat started to hurt, his vocal chords being strained by such a noise. Sora's dick, previously dripping pre-cum onto the stone floor like his mouth was dripping saliva, twitched vigorously at this new sensation, and all at once, Sora felt a strange new feeling engulf him like never before, as his orgasm overtook him._

Shivering deeply, feeling the motion down to his very core, Sora forced his fingers deeper, feeling the slickness inside still left from Axel's earlier intrusion into his claimed body, lubricating all three digits which were being rammed in, all the way up to his knuckles. Panting like in his memory, in the same exact position, but with his hands free to work himself over the edge on his own, his right hand was gripped tightly at the base of his already rigid staff, pulling and tugging none to gently, his entire body caught in the memory and the feeling of it all.

It was to the memory of Axel's warm seed coating the inside of his bowels after that first mind-blowing orgasm that finally sent Sora over the edge again, his own pool of semen shooting out, onto the bed covers below. His hand stayed stroking, however, though the velocity had slowed considerably already, until both of his appendages were completely still, his chest heaving and straining, trying to help him catch his breath. With a slight grunt, Sora relinquished his grip on the pillow he'd bitten down on to stop his screaming moans from getting too loud, and gave a shuddering, feral moan as his fingers slipped out of the creamy heat of his ass.

For a second; one unforgiving, split second, Sora allowed himself to forget the world. To forget Axel. To forget himself. He lowered himself onto the bed, flat, and took a long, deep breath in satisfaction. Only to suddenly find the burning sensation on his stomach flaring up, full blast, causing him to flinch badly, and twist his entire body to the side, setting off the pain in his ass, searing and fiery turmoil that shot through his entire body, setting every single nerve end on edge. His chest contracted for a moment as his heart pounded, only making his body hurt more, and reflexively, his hand went to the bed so that he could raise himself into a sitting position, only for his hand to find the gooey pool of his own juices that he'd made, thinking such gruesome thoughts. Committing such gruesome acts.

Shakily, Sora raised himself onto his ass, despite the pain that constantly throbbed at him, reminding him where he was, who he was... and what he'd done. Raising both arms, he held both hands in front of his now tearful view, seeing his left fingers, coated still in what was Axel's lingering semen... and his right fingers, coated in his own...

He was sick. He was a mess. Horrible, idiotic, horrifying, sinful, grotesque, monsterish, slutty, disgusting, shameful-

Sora's thoughts hit a dead stop, his hands slowly falling to his knees, heedless of how bits of the semen rubbed off on the sweatpants he'd been forced to wear by Axel. It didn't matter anymore. Sora... the once mighty Keyblade weilder... was a slut. A sinful... dirty...

Slut.

Once more, for probably the hundreth time tonight, Sora could feel tears sliding down his cheeks.

 

* * *

 

 

" Good morning, Roxas. "

Axel's voice cut through the dim fog of semi-sleep that Sora had somehow drifted into again, only for a gentle hand to come down on Sora's shoulder. It always started out like this, Sora thought dimly, slowly allowing his eyelids to flutter halfway open, cerulean eyes coming to focus on emerald green hues, staring straight back at him. Filled with warmth; with caring and love, even. Axel had laid down on the bed before he woke Sora, and manipulated Sora's body to where Sora was nestled into every single curve of Axel's form, with Axel's arms around him and one of Axel's leg drapped over Sora's own. A lover's embrace.

Using his left hand, Axel gently reached to Sora's brown locks, brushing them to the side, away from his face, before he leant forward, placing a tender kiss on his forehead. Axel's hand stayed on Sora's cheek for a moment, the soft pads of his fingers delicately massaging the skin there as Axel spoke once more.

" What, no 'Mornings are horrible, Axel, get out of my face' ? " Axel gave a smile that probably would have warmmed the hearts of anyone, and possibly make several women swoon. But the smile only made Sora shiver slightly with the fright of what would be to come... and slutty antisipation. Sora felt about ready to disolve into tears again, knowing that he couldn't say anything to Axel. If he did... well... he'd tried that before...

_" I'm not Roxas... Please Axel, I'm not Roxas. I'm Sora. So- Ra. " Sora pleaded to Axel, trying desperately to escape the older male's grasp, but only getting himself tangled up in the covers on the large, kingsized bed. Which further impeeded his movement. Which he definately didn't need. Sparing a glance toward Axel to see how he was taking Sora's denial, it sent a thrill of fear shooting fiercely down his spine to see emerald hues ablaze with sudden anger. Sora felt Axel shift, and the next second, both of Axel's hands were gripping Sora's shoulders with enough force to press him further into the bed on his back, and probably bruise the tender flesh as well._

_Axel's lips were curved upward, but not in a smile, and not in a smirk, either; in a snarl. A feral, ugly, raging snarl._

_" Shut up! Shut up, I don't want to hear it! I KNOW you have my Roxas in there! And one way or another, I'm going to find my Roxas, and you're never going to stop me! I'll keep you here forever if I have to! " As Axel was shouting, he started shaking Sora's shoulders, causing the thin, fragile body beneath him to flail around, trying to defend himself from the stronger of the two, and rather feebily so._

_" Please! No! I'm not Roxas! Just let me go! "_

_" SHUT UP! "_

_Sora was pinned to the bed roughly as Axel stradled his hips, holding his body effectively in place while he reached for Sora's flailing arms, taking hold of both wrists eventually and pinning them above Sora's head. By now, Sora's heart had already been sent into a panicked scramble, his breathing hard and shakey even as he continued twisting, trying to fight off the violent male, only to be met with the sight of Axel's flaming red mane as his head tilted downward, seconds before a searing pain shot through the sensitive bud that was his exposed nipple, as he wasn't allowed a shirt. Sora's mouth opened, a shrill scream coming from the depths of his throat, surprising Sora at the volume of it._

_But the real surprise was the gentle hand that softly came to his cheek, the burning pain finally releasing his right nipple, only to be replaced by a dull throbbing hurt, even as Sora found Axel's face come back into view. Axel lowered his face toward Sora's, so that there were only mere inches away, and with a shiver that seemed to send a message to his entire body against his will to respond, Sora felt Axel's breath as he spoke._

_" I'm sorry Roxas. I didn't mean to hurt you. But don't worry... I'll make it up to you, just like the good old days... "_

_And then Axel's hand was slipping down from Sora's cheek, down, between the both of their bodies, to a place it shouldn't be, but no matter how he tried, Sora couldn't stop him._

" Roxas? Hello? " Still feeling the hand upon his cheek, Sora flinched outwardly, only to curse his reaction, knowing it would spur something from Axel again. And yet, there was that absolutely disgusting side of him that seemed to be growing all the more lately, that wanted to reach out with his own arms, throw them around Axel's neck, and force his own kisses on the male who had dominated him from the start. But Axel's eyes were already starting to narrow again. His grip became tighter. And Sora's hopes sank; if they were ever there to begin with.

" Still not going to let me talk to you, Roxas...? " Somewhere in the back of Sora's mind, he thought he heard a few pangs of sadness in Axel's voice, but that was completely overwhelmed by the fright of what was going to happen to him this time around. Every morning... every morning he'd woken up in this very room for three years straight, this happened... and yet, it was never the same. In some ways... it was worse every time. So Sora couldn't find his voice to answer Axel even then, which only seemed to make him angrier.

Without warning, a hand landed over his cheek, leaving a burning sting and probably an intensely red mark as well, that may very well turn into a bruise soon. Sora caught himself trying to stifle the large gasp that came from this very action, even as Axel caught hold of his arms and threw him backward, onto his back, despite the covers slightly tangled around his legs, and the embrace they'd earlier been tangled in as well. Sora went sprawling in the bed, his limbs flailing, trying to escape the male who was starting to come over him again. And by some strange stroke of luck... some insane, sadistic miracle... the covers fell off of Sora, allowing him the movement to roll out of Axel's way, off the bed, and onto the floor, where he landed on his hands and knees.

Frozen there for a split moment of shock at actually evading his captor, Sora's eyes widened, and for the first time in what seemed like an eternity, his hopes soared. Until Axel's maddened growl sounded out from over top of Sora, which seemed to spur his body into motion. For once, it was like his body was finally cooperating with his mind, running when told to run. And run Sora did, straight toward the door that rarely ever opened; the only way in, and the only way out. Wooden, with no window or bars of any kind, the door, in Sora's mind, was the only thing standing between him and freedom from Axel and these wicked things he did to his body.

If only he could reach the door, Sora thought, then he would be safe. But life. Ah, cruel, twisted life... Life wouldn't allow him even that small goal. Five feet away from the solitary, somber door, Sora was tackled by a snarling Axel, his entire body being slammed onto the stone floor, pain exploding in his knees, elbows, shoulders, and chin where they collided. Another shriek came from Sora's lips, but this time, Axel didn't even try to hush him. Without a word, Axel's unforgiving hands were forcing Sora's limbs into a position they seemed to know all too well by now. So with his ass now in the air, knees crushed painfully against stone, and shakey elbows crushing themselves, trying to support the weight of the male draping himself over him, Sora tried to remember his life back before any of this had happened to him.

He tried to remember Riku and Kairi... Donald and Goofy... the Heartless and the Nobodys... but his thoughts became scattered when his only form of protection, in the form of one pair of roughly used, silver coloured sweatpants, was pulled off his flesh, taken down to his knees, where it restricted his movements should he decide to try and dash for the door again. Sora closed his eyes tightly, unable to help a whimper that escaped his lips. Despite his fear, he could feel his body reacting to the closeness of Axel, feeling the head of the older male's body, his entire form atuned enough to know that when he slightly leaned back, not far enough away from Sora that he couldn't catch him if he lunged again, but enough to start undoing his Organization XIII cloak, that he would be gentle, despite his earlier raging. Sora had no evidence to back this up; but deep in his core... in his soul; in his heart. He knew.

Of course, this only made him more nervous and frightened, while at the same time, he could feel his member growing harder by the minute, his hindquarters gently swaying as though in invitation. The only thing worse than having Axel shove him to the floor and rape him like a whore, Sora thought... was having Axel gently lavish his entire body with kisses and caresses, and show Sora for the slut he was becoming. Because when Axel raped him, he had an excuse; that he was unwilling. But when Axel is gentle...

Sora shuddered, only to gasp, involuntarily shoving his hips backward toward the probing fingers, slick already with saliva, that had somehow found their way to his hole while he'd been in thought. Axel responded to this motion with a gentle thrust of two fingers, his index and middle it felt like, and curved them just slightly. This motion sent a sparkwave of pleasure shooting through Sora's entire body, causing him to moan out quietly at first, but with growing volume through the one, long noise, before finally cutting off into a series of pants as Axel twisted his fingers, only to start up a quick thrusting motion of said digits.

Sora felt with his entire body, nerves standing on edge and tingling everywhere, when Axel's left hand gently came down to Sora's left ass cheek, groping and caressing with care and tenderness, even as the male leant over Sora's body once more, heated flesh meeting scorching skin, only for a taste test from Axel; Sora was unable to hold back a louder, more provocative moan when Axel's tounge slashed a long, slow line over Sora's shoulderblades, causing his entire body to shiver and revel in the warmth of such a delicate motion, only to shudder again in the cold of the aftermath. But then Axel's warm, velvetine lips were decending on Sora's back, making his entire body rock with the stimuli of butterfly kisses floating up and down his shoulders and back, while his ass was groped and thrusted into by a set of beautiful, long, expert fingers.

Sora's eyes rolled back into his head, his breathing falling into a ravaged, primal rhythm that Axel seemed to somehow control. His body moved on it's own, pushing back into fingers that were slowly but surely removing themselves from Sora's tightness, until there was nothing left to fill that gaping hole, making Sora quiver with want. With need. Sora waited, but soon, even the hand at his ass and the wonderful, passionate floating kisses were taken away from him, leaving him on his elbows and knees, his hips wiggling his rear in the air in what he hoped was a tantalizing motion for Axel, whimpers and whines and panting, ragged breaths coming from his lips.

Yet still, nothing happened. Sora's body was almost in a fit by now, acting out as if a child who had their candy taken away before they could eat their fill. Sora's body felt heavy, sluggish, his nerves making each and every breath he and Axel took seem as though it were pleasure given from the skies above. But it wasn't enough. No where near enough; he needed more. So he did what felt natural. Something Sora hardly believed he would ever do, and yet had done many times before, this time included. He begged.

" Axel...! Axel, please! Please, I need- ... I need... " Sora broke off the sentance, trying to put two thoughts together in the scrambled mess his mind was right now. Still waving his rump in the air, more vigorously now, Sora started to try again, but was met instead with a gentle but firm slap to his wiggling ass, which stilled him for all of two seconds, before he moaned loud enough he should have been heard a few miles away; loud enough to make his vocal chords hurt again, and his round bottom started its motion again, but this time, with more conviction. Axel spoke.

" I need my Roxas. "

Close to crying again, this time with frustration at the older male's comment, and his entire situation in general, Sora cried out, buring his face in his arms but continuing the motion his hips had started up, trying to entice Axel to just push him over the edge again.

" I AM Roxas, I AM Roxas! PLEASE, Axel, I AM Roxas! I NEED you! "

Sora only heard a sigh from Axel behind him, and for a split, heartpounding second, Sora actually believed Axel would just get up and walk away from him, leaving him like this. But then his nerves exploded as Axel's hands came down on both sides of Sora's ass cheeks, rubbing and gently parting; even such a small motion as this sent Sora's body rocking back and forth again, trying to gain more pleasure from it, even though there was virtually none; yet. But when the thick flesh of Axel's arousal was placed at the exposed hole of Sora's, it was completely Sora's doing when he thrusted his hips backward, that resulted in the slight tearing sensation that Sora noticed as Axel was pushed deep within his form. But whatever pain there might have been was overruled and thrown far from his mind due to the pleasure that suddenly swamped him from head to toe.

Sora's entire body quivered with insane feelings of esctacy, long before Axel finally shifted his hands from Sora's bum to his hips, to still the sudden, wild rocking the younger male had started, taking control of the entire position once more and leaning Sora forward a little more, so he was at the perfect entry position for him. The shifting, and the being unable to move, created loud whimpers and inaudible protests to come from Sora's parted lips, a bit of saliva mirroring the already heavily dripping rod that Sora realized was there, only when Axel's hand came around his entire body to cup it in his hand, before wrapping his digits around it and squeezing gently, but firmly, even as Axel's hips started thrusting slowly.

Already panting heavily, feeling as though his heart and entire body would just spontaniously combust on the spot, Sora tried to squirm backward against his captor, only to meet the same restriction as before; the hand on his hip, keeping him still. This only made him whine louder, between his gasps for breath and his long, high-pitched moanings as Axel slowly - Very, very slowly - began to up the rhythm of both, stroking Sora's engorged cock, and thrusting his own blood-filled member into the heated depths of Sora's bowels. It felt to Sora as if it took forever, while in reality, it only took fifteen minutes for both body rhythms to become the same, animalistic, frantic movements, gasps and moans and feral sounds filling the silence within Sora's bedroom until finally, the pleasure mounted and became too much for Sora to bear.

" AXEL! " Sora yelled, what felt like at the top of his lungs, from the way his throat strained, even as his entire body clenched, shuddering and quivering with satisfied delight and delicious sensations, stars exploding behind his rolled eyes, until his body felt weak, tired and exhausted. So caught up in his own orgasm, Sora didn't even note that his orgasmic convultions caused Axel to soar over the edge of orgasm himself, to bury his shaft deep within the heated contractions of Sora's anal cannal to empty himself into the younger male. Nor did Sora realize when Axel gently withdrew from his body after a few minutes of heaving and panting over the younger below him, who had almost fully collapsed in on himself.

What Sora did realize, however, was the feeling of leaving the ground. Through a pleasure fog, Sora's hazy mind registered the way Axel cradled Sora's stature to his own broad frame, and carried him easily back to the bed, where Sora was deposited with infinite care, only to be tucked into the covers and kissed on the forehead by Axel. But distorted as it was, in the aftermath of such an intense orgasm, Sora found himself drifting off to sleep, unable to keep his eyes open any longer. Just before reaching the edge of sleep, however, Sora could have sworn he heard Axel whisper in his ear,

" Sleep tight, Roxas. "

And somewhere inside Sora, a part that was him, and yet... wasn't quite him... smiled. A quip popped into Sora's head, just a fleeting thought, even though he was too sleepy to utter it.

' Goodnight, Sweet Prince. '


	2. The Dream

Screams and moans. Not just any kind, either. The shrill, emotion-pierced, high pitched screams, and the deep, throaty, lusty moans; the ones that seem to reverberate to your very core and make you melt, even though nothing's being done to you. That's what Sora heard. Helpless to his legs, which seemed to take him closer and closer to where the sound was, he found himself moving down strange hallways, darkness lining the walls around him, swirling, menacing, and yet innocent and childlike in the way the flame like edges flickered around.

Sora rounded a corner, one of many that he'd done so already, only to come to a door; A door he knew well, and a door that caused a giant cold shiver to trail it's way down his spine, like a long, bony finger of death itself. Still, he had no control over his body, and saw his arm stretch out, between the small distance left between him and the handle. He took hold of the small knob, and against his will, turned and opened it.

The husky, luscious moans and the wailing, excited screams seemed to pierce through Sora's very stature the second the door opened, and his eyes became wide. Axel and himself lay on the very bed he'd been raped on so much, only Sora couldn't quite put his finger on why his other self didn't look quite right. The hair was different, Sora finally figured out, despite the sudden slowing of his mind, the heaviness of his body produced by the sudden thoughts that tumbled into his mind while just standing there, watching two naked bodies pound out a rhythm together.

The moans were getting louder, playing on Sora's body like a musician tuning a guitar before he strums it, each chord in perfect harmony with the next, to play a lovely little serenade. Sweat glistened on the two bodies before him, shining their skin and giving off a musky smell that only seemed to make Sora just as aroused as the actual scene before him itself, as shameless as it was. The Sora on the bed was acting so wantonly, so slutty, bucking his hips upward to meet the thrusting hips of Axel, who was draped over the other Sora's back. The other Sora was kneeling on his hands and knees, but his limbs looked insanely shaky, especially as Axel's hands came around his chest, slender fingers finding and pulling at the other Sora's nipples before taking them between his index and thumbs and tenderly rolling them.

With a shaky breath, the real Sora could feel his own nipples tightening and hardening, just by watching a mirror of himself reacting with absolute animalistic abandon. The urge to reach up, and try with his own shaking digits what he saw Axel doing to the mirror of himself on the bed was too much, and he was helpless to fight the motion that brought a shock to his entire system, his body jolting forward, and for a second, one deliciously sinful moment, Sora thought he would drop to his knees in front of the two before him, who seemed so oblivious to his earlier entrance.

Sora's breath hitched and caught in his throat as his own fingers manipulated a path over his beaded nipples, unheeding as to how he might have looked with both hands pressed to his chest, his face locked in a rapturous moment of pure carnal pleasure, watching the two on the bed, seeing the rhythm starting to escalate, which only aroused Sora to the point of a painful hardness, to a point where he just wanted to close his eyes and let the feeling take him into orgasm again. But it was like there was some other force at work here, just like there had been since he'd been captured by Axel. Something that forced him to ignore his body's wants, despite the slight thrusting motion of his hips into the air, seeking pleasure and finding nothing. Something that made him watch what was happening with widened, hazed-over eyes.

The moans were coming from both people now, crashing like hot, molten waves over Sora, inflaming him from the inside out with a heat he couldn't escape; only fuel. The look on Axel's face, and even the look on the strange, slightly off mirror of his own looked caught in the rapturous undertow of a deadly current, just as helpless as the real Sora to fight it. But then Axel's left hand dropped away from the other Sora's left nipple, causing a whine from both Sora's, as the real Sora's hand followed Axel's movements just a few seconds off beat, but the whine didn't last long, instead dissolving into a long, loud moan, both heads tipping backward in pure ecstasy as Axel's hand came down upon the other Sora's throbbing member; and so did the real Sora's hand come down on his own, gripping as tightly as it felt it needed to be; deliciously tight.

The insane pleasure of any kind of movement caught Sora completely off guard, his knees finally giving way and sending him crashing into the stone floor beneath, crushing his knees below him, but the pain didn't seem to register to him. Sora's hand moved in time with Axel's thrusts, Sora's moans and gasping whimpers falling into alignment with his counterpart's screaming moans. Pleasure crashed over Sora's body in wave after wave, getting stronger each time as his own hands moved with their own will, twisting and gently pulling the delicate bud of a nipple on his right side, and feverishly gripping and pulling on the heated hardness between his legs, his body taking little time to get to the point where it was quivering on the edge of release, his throat burning from the intense screams that were drawn from the depths of his throat.

He and the Sora that wasn't quite himself seemed completely in sync, with their thrusting movements, the way their heads were thrown back in pure abandon, the screaming moans that erupted from their widely parted lips; and then the fire overtook Sora, and his thoughts were sent into a scrambled oblivion. There was no thinking; just moving. Hips, fingers, and delicious heat; throbbing, lapping at his sweat, throwing him over the edge of no return.

Axel's sensuous voice, husky and raspy with heaving breaths called out in the moment, yelling Roxas' name. But the answering scream came from two mouths.

" AXEL! " Lights exploded. Ecstasy. And then... Nothing.

Sora didn't know he had returned to consciousness, or even that he had left it in the first place. He didn't even know if he actually heard Axel's voice or not. But the voice seemed to ring in the back of his head.

" Eat it. "

Sora was helpless to do anything... but obey.

XXX

Sora's mouth was working long before the sleep-heavy eyelids of his fluttered open, reminding him that he still lived. It took him a very long, foggy moment to realize why his mouth was working; his left digits had somehow nestled their way into his mouth, and of it's own will, Sora's tongue was lavishly coating them with a generous layer of saliva. A strange taste was left in his mouth, and as sluggishly weighted down as Sora felt, there was no point in trying to stop such an action. Slightly panting for no reason at all, bits and pieces of a dream came back to him. Finding Axel and himself - no... it wasn't really himself... it couldn't have been - on a bed, doing sickening acts together... The moment... the feeling of it all...

Sora's eyes suddenly widened, and he shot up into a sitting position, a few stray covers falling off his torso as he went. Yanking his fingers from his mouth, his hands were shaking as he turned around his left hand to see his digits. Nothing but saliva. But the taste in his mouth... the musky, salty taste... Sora's breath hitched, but this time, it was with anything but pleasure as he looked down at himself; trousers tossed to his ankles, his once swollen member now shriveled, his lower body half coated with a thin, gooey white substance.

With a quick, jerky movement, Sora held himself over the bed, retching on the floor.

XXX

Axel himself was almost in tears, sitting at the wooden table that had been set up a long while back by Xemnas for him. Most of this labyrinth, in fact, was made by Xemnas with the excuse of giving Axel something to do to keep him out of his hair between missions. Of course, that didn't stop others from bringing their things down here, and using the several different rooms and dead ends for storage units for everything they've collected through the years. And occasionally, though never before had Axel wished more feverishly that it didn't have to happen now, another Organization member would find him.

Demyx's voice caused Axel's shoulders to stiffen, emerald hues, thick with tears, closing tightly, as though to block out his cheerful friend; as if when he closed his eyes, Demyx would disappear into the darkness.

He didn't.

" Hey Axel, what's up, man? "

Axel didn't answer; he couldn't through the lump in his throat, even as he desperately tried to blink back the tears in his eyes. But Demyx had caught him too off guard; Axel wasn't able to hide the traces of his sadness before the male came around the front side of the table, his once bright smile fading into somber worry at the heartbreaking pain and sadness painted on Axel's features. Slowly, almost numbly, Demyx sat in the chair next to Axel, worrying for a second before lifting his right arm, and placing his hand on Axel's shoulder, half expecting the always prideful Axel to shrug it away, saying he didn't need comfort or pity.

Axel said nothing though, simply turned his gaze away from his friend, and closed his eyes, giving up the struggle to hide his tears, and simply allowing the salty drop to cascade down his pale facial features, slightly marring the purple, upside down tear-shaped marking on his cheek along it's path downward. Peering at his tearful friend through light blue hues, Demyx gave a soft sigh. He'd known Axel was pretty torn up about Roxas and his Somebody, Sora, but never before in his life had he seen Axel this depressed. It made him worry for his friend's sanity; and his own safety.

" Axel... come on, man. Talk to me; it's Roxas again, isn't it? "

But Axel still wouldn't respond to him, and that made Demyx's expression fall a ways. Axel had always been the happiest of all of them. The most talkative, the most hopeful, always looking on the bright side of things and cracking jokes, even at the most inappropriate moments. But ever since Roxas disappeared inside Sora, Axel had obsessed over trying to reunite himself with his former lover. Demyx had tried to check on Axel frequently lately, and almost every time he came around the labyrinth, screams and moans could be heard, echoing off the walls. It didn't take that wild of a guess to imagine how Axel was trying to reach Roxas.

But it had been three years. Even without the Keyblade Wielder to help along the process of gathering hearts for Kingdom Hearts, the entire plan had backfired. Xemnas had almost been destroyed when Kingdom Hearts exploded, the hopes and dreams and aspirations of the entire Organization XIII, crushed along with it. Sora was no longer needed according to the failed plan, and yet, Axel kept him, locked up like a pet. Demyx wasn't sure if Xemnas knew if Sora was still alive or not, but if he did, it surprised Demyx to know that he allowed Axel's steady decline into depression due to the boy. Everyone in the Organization had given up; accepted Roxas was gone for good.

All except for Axel.

Finally, after a long period of silence, Axel gave a shifting motion of his shoulders, shrugging off Demyx's hand that had been placed on his shoulder a while before. Axel stood, turning around and giving his back to Demyx without a single word, dragging his feet while he walked. He no longer had that joyous bounce to his step, sway to his hips, flair to his walk. Axel was worse than dead, Demyx thought, watching the redhead turn the corner and disappear into the labyrinth, Axel was living a nightmare. And even though Axel probably couldn't hear him, Demyx found it in the heart he was promised, but never received, to say aloud,

" Good luck, Axel... I really hope you find Roxas soon. For everyone's sakes. "

XXX

It took much longer than normal for Axel to put a lid on the strange emotions bubbling up to the surface, partly because of Demyx's whispered comment as Axel was leaving. How could he go on like this? How could he go on, trying and failing every damn day of this pitiful existence to regain Roxas? ... He couldn't.

Stopping halfway down a familiar hallway, Axel stood in the middle of the path, his head hung low. He'd left Demyx back many, many turns away, and didn't fear being found. It wouldn't matter even if he was, though, Axel thought.

' Maybe I should just... give up. Admit defeat. ' But Sora's movements were once again in his head, matching and mirroring Roxas's every move. The myriad of looks on his face, the deepness to his sky blue eyes, the screams, the moans, the way his entire body seemed to glow in the aftermath of their love-making...

The loud noise of Axel's clenched fist coming against the steel wall to his side startled even Axel himself. He kept his head down, and his eyes shut tightly, but that didn't stop the tears from flowing again, even after he'd supposedly gotten himself back under control. Why wouldn't the pain stop? ... Would it ever end?

" ... Roxas. " Axel panted, holding a newly made, burning wound. His emerald hues finding those of Roxas's cerulean hues, despite the fact that his entire vision was blurring on him due to the hard fight before. Roxas arched an eyebrow like always, still holding his keyblade, and Axel took that as his cue to continue, his lips trying to muster up the effort to smile at the kid. " ... let's meet again. In the next life... "

Roxas paused, as if to think for a second, before he nodded somberly.

" Yeah, I'll be waiting. " Was the only answer Axel received, but it was enough. And yet... it wasn't. Unable to help his stammered reply, just before the darkness took him under, Axel muttered out,

" ... heh... silly... just because you have a next life... "

Axel's eyelids slowly raised from their previously closed position, but only halfway, his emerald hues staring down somberly at the stone flooring. By some strange stroke of luck, the damage Roxas had done to him then wasn't enough to actually kill him. So his Roxas had been right; he was waiting for Axel to come and find him. But would he ever actually find him inside that boy, Sora?

Three years. Three long years it had been, and yet... nothing. Silently, raising his left fist to gently rest it on the wall, opposite the right fist he'd slammed into it earlier, he leant against the wall itself, delicately placing his forehead between both fists and closing his eyes again. He couldn't manage this. He couldn't go on. So Axel decided, with a strangely empty feeling in the pit of his stomach, that he'd give it one more day. One more try. If Roxas just didn't respond... then that was it. No more suffering. If there was any kind of afterlife for Nobodies... then he and Roxas would soon find out.

Pushing himself slowly off the wall, Axel steeled himself for what was to come. One way or another, he would be reunited with his Roxas. For a split second, Axel wavered, wondering if he could really go through with killing the body that looked so much like his beloved lover, and destroy the one soul that had made him feel like he'd had a heart again. But a certain conviction steeled his nerves. The depression that had been setting in before seemed to wash over him with a new emotion, transforming it's bitter self into something far more deadly. Determination.

Axel began the trek to the room where he kept Sora and his Roxas.

XXX

The door opened with a gentle creaking sound, more soothing than annoying, but the smell that greeted Axel was anything but soothing. It smelt like someone had thrown up in the room, and as Axel looked toward the red and silver bed that he'd given the younger male, he found Sora curled on his side, sideways on the bed, with his head half hanging over the side of the bed. And on the floor where Sora's head was half lolling, was a large pile of sick. Axel's eyes widened, all earlier thoughts and emotions completely forgotten. He rushed to the side of the bed, maneuvering carefully, so as to not step in the puddle of puke at his feet, and brought his right arm around the younger male's head, gently supporting the neck and picking him up slightly at the same time.

Sora's eyes were closed at the moment, and there were faint traces of sick at the edges of his lips; his dirty brown hair was matted, plastered to the sickly pallor of his facial features. Axel's eyes slowly widened a bit more than they had been as he realized what had happened the moment he'd walked through the door. For the first time in a long while, looking at the young male in his arms, he didn't just see the Roxas that never answered him. Instead, he saw Sora, the young man he'd kidnapped three years back, held against his will, and raped on a daily basis. And he looked all the worse for wear, too. Sora was skinnier than ever, despite Axel's careful and methodical planning of feeding times, three times each day.

Sora's body was dusty and dirtied, scrapped and burned and bruised, scarred and scabbed and marred in several places. Blood painted the silver pillow and sheets beneath the boy in small spots, dotted everywhere randomly. Sora's chest rose and fell slowly, but with a slight rattling sound. Slowly, Axel's widened eyes closed as he brought Sora closer to him, cradling the boy like a newborn baby. He'd come in here with thoughts of killing them both if he couldn't find Roxas, only to find he'd halfway done the job already.

He couldn't do it. Axel found that, in holding this boy's battered and abused body, no matter how badly he wanted his Roxas back, no matter how long it took, Axel just couldn't kill him. Tears burned in smoldering, emerald hues, as Axel slowly stood, careful not to wake Sora. Things had to change. Maybe one day, he'd be reunited with his love; but until then... he had to start doing things differently.

Axel knew just how to start.

XXX

Warmth filled Sora to the core, slowly dragging him out of his vomit-induced sleep. Slowly, hesitantly, Sora tried to think back to previous events, and remembered that he'd woken up after having that sick dream, with barely enough time to lean over the bed and spew the contents of his stomach onto the floor. He was sick a total of three times before his stomach finally stopped it's painful convulsing, and exhausted, he had collapsed back against the bed, too worn out to move. With the taste of his own sick in his mouth, he had passed out, but strangely enough, that taste wasn't there upon his wakening.

Not even the smell of his own vomit found Sora's nostrils; instead a fine scent of lavender seemed to gently lull him into a calm, soothed state, even as it slowly brought him to his senses. The heat that seemed so ever existant around his entire body rose off of him in waves, like steam, heating even the air around him. It was wonderfully luxurious, and yet... something in the back of his mind was trying to get his attention. His cell shouldn't feel this way. It was by no means ever cold, and he always had a blanket to curl himself into, but even when Axel tucked him into the curves of his body, Sora never felt this much heat.

Still, too pleasant to let go, Sora avoided opening his eyes, hoping with a passion that somehow, if he just pretended to stay sleeping, all would be right with the world, and Axel would never come for him again. He would be back at home with all his friends, still fighting the heartless and the Organization, and none of this would have ever -

A silky feeling smoothed up the inner part of Sora's calf, not un-pleasant, but startling enough to shock Sora's eyes open wide, his entire body curving at the waist, sending him into a sitting position. Seconds later, Sora was met with a face full of almost boiling water, shocking him even further and causing him to gasp loudly, only to swallow a small amount of said water. But then there were hands on his shoulders, trying to soothe away the sudden flailing Sora was doing, and after a few minutes of coughing and sputtering, Sora finally cleared his lungs enough to breath deeply and properly.

At least, until the voice of Axel found his ears. Sora's breath hitched, only to stop completely, and his heart skipped a beat as he stared straight ahead, his entire body starting to quiver with fright... and sickening anticipation.

" Shhh now. It's alright. Sit still, alright Ro- ... Sora? "

Axel sounded hesitant on Sora's name, but the fact that he'd even called Sora by his real name astounded the male sitting in bathwater, obviously drawn for him. Too afraid to say much, Sora settled for saying nothing, but beginning to breathe again, his cerulean hues darting around quickly, taking in his new environment. He was sitting in a huge, deep tub, that quite literally caused the water to come up to his shoulders even when he was sitting upright, which made him wonder how he didn't drown while laying down. Looking backward, that was answered by the steep incline at the back of the tub; from the look of it, if Sora laid down against it again, the water would come up just to his chin.

The entire room he was in seemed to be nothing more than a large bathroom, built for luxury. There were a few tables scattered around the bathtub in a circle, and each one held burning incense; probably where the lavender smell came from. The water around him was completely suds free, clear enough he could see to the very bottom of the tub clearly, and so hot, not only was there steam rising off the water itself, but most of his skin appeared red underneath.

How long had it been since he'd had a proper bath...? The answer was kind of saddening to Sora, even in his slightly shocked, overwhelmed state. Since before he'd come here. Hesitantly, Sora shifted his eyes back to Axel, who had continued to crouch patiently at the side of the tub, his arms hooked over the edge of the ceramic edge, elbows bent and arms crisscrossing on top of each other. In his right hand, he held what had to be the most smoothest, silky looking sponge that ever had to be made, and suddenly, it clicked. Sora realized that Axel must have been trying to wipe him down with that, and that had been what brought him fully out of his sleep before.

He had only been trying to help.

... Sora was just confused, now.

A slight movement from Axel brought Sora out of his wayward thinking pattern; the redheaded male had raised the hand that held the small silk scrub, waving it gently in the air, keeping in line with the other arm that lay crossed over the side of the tub where Sora resided for now. Sora's eyes widened in fear and anticipation at the same time out of instinct, though his suddenly racing heart seemed to calm slightly when Axel spoke to him, his voice smooth and sultry almost, but with a care that he usually only spoke to Sora with, when he was trying to talk to Roxas.

Cerulean eyes still rounded with something akin to shock, Sora absentmindedly nodded, without quite realizing what he was consenting to; but the sudden, small smile on Axel's face seemed to pierce Sora with the strangest feeling; warming him in places where even the water couldn't reach. Axel's hand slipped below the water, and Sora found himself jumping again when the silk of the sponge caressed the top of his knee, sending the water sloshing around, and slightly out of the sides. Axel didn't move out of the path of the water, however; letting the water that sloshed out find his Organization XIII cloak, splattering all over his knees and slightly around his stomach. His sleeves, raised prior it seemed, were no worse for wear, out of the spray of water, and it looked like he had taken his gloves off for this, as well. Instead, he simply continued lightly moving the silken sponge over Sora's leg, first down his shin to his toes, then up again, working a path of cleanliness.

Without a word from either of them, the scrub traced it's length from Sora's shins, to his shoulders, down to his back and around to his chest, all the while, Sora found it hard to contain himself. Hands clutched at the bottom of the basin near his sides, he struggled to keep his breathing even, especially when the silken scrub traced itself over his nipples, horrified to find they hardened in want with only a few ginger passes over them. Whether Axel took notice of this, Sora didn't know, and Sora didn't bother to look, because by that point, his head had started to loll backward, his eyes fluttering closed, dirty, luscious thoughts flying around in his head as Axel's sponge continued stroking, caressing, trailing downward, down...

A loud gasp came from Sora's lips, his hips jerking upward to meet the silk that had just stroked over his hardened member, the water sloshing about once more with the motion. Closing his eyes even tighter, hard enough to find stars starting to appear behind his lids, Sora lost his grasp on his careful breathing, his chest beginning to heave and fall heavily as the silken scrub slid tantalizingly up and down Sora's throbbing shaft, light enough that it was barely there, for what seemed like only a few seconds, before the silk was moving down to his thighs once more, into what Sora already knew was washed territory. With an almost painful throb from his member, and a heavy shudder, Sora's lips parted enough to allow sound to escape them.

" Axel, you're always such a damn tease... " came out of Sora's mouth before he even realized what he was saying.

This stopped both of their motions for a tense, heavy few seconds, before Sora's hands came up to his mouth, covering his lips even as his eyes widened; how had that come from his mouth? He hadn't even planned to say anything. But Axel's reaction was different. Abandoning the silk scrub to the now slightly murky bathwater, Axel stood hurriedly, making his own little splash of water, and causing a small wave to hit Sora's chin.

" Roxas? " Axel's voice held apprehension and excitement, both hands fisting and coming out slightly, his elbows bent at his sides and the lower part of his arms outstretched toward Sora; he leant forward, his own emerald eyes wide, but for a completely different reason. " Roxas? Please, tell me that's you! "

But Sora could only answer with silent, wide eyes, both hands still clamped over his betraying lips, speaking words he didn't mean to say. The two men stared at each other for what seemed like the longest time, the steam in the bath not being the only thing that caused Sora's cheeks to deepen in a red hue as Axel slowly stood straighter, letting his arms fall by the wayside to his hips. A few emotions crawled across the redhead's expression; disappointment, depression, frustration, agitation, anger, and then...

With a yell of pure fury, Axel's hands came upward just to slam down in the bathwater Sora sat in, making him squirm with fright at the sight of the older male before him, seconds before Axel's hands seemed to cause a strange bubbling sensation in the water that started out softly, but in next to no time at all, had the entire water bubbling with unforgiving heat, causing Sora to gasp and struggle, his own hands coming up to claw at the edges, to somehow lift himself out of the deep tub, but every time he tried to grasp the side, his hands would slip, and he'd have to begin all over, his skin becoming a deep, crimson red from the scalding heat of the bubbling water.

Even the steam was hurting Sora, breathing on his face with malevolent intent to melt his skin; kicking and flailing and struggling, Sora started to cry out; the pain was all he could think about now. How it seemed to attack every nerve in his entire body, burning, scalding, ripping away his flesh piece by piece until everything became numb. Sora didn't remember when he closed his eyes; only barely felt the burning sting as the water came around his face... up his nose... in his mouth. He didn't realize when he passed out, only that he did.


	3. Roxas Revealed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Axel is about to give up hope, but he forgot one important thing. A light in the dark shines brighter than a light in the day.

* Flashback *

With a heavy head that sat in upturned palms, elbows resting unevenly and painfully on his knees, Axel didn't bother to look up when the door to his room clicked open. Axel knew with a sinking feeling that judgment had been passed on him; and Roxas. Last night had been a killer for the heart that Axel lacked, since Roxas had decided to leave the Organization. Not even Axel's words seemed to want to dissuade him from the path he'd taken. Eyes closed tightly, trying and failing to keep the tears from falling down his pale features, Axel's memory was still haunted by two gut-wrenching lines spoken by the two.

' ... No one will miss me. '

'... That's not true ... I will... '

Axel's digits came down in a tighter grip against his flame-red hair; his face scrunched with bone shattering pain, and yet, the words wouldn't go away. Louder and louder, became the one voice that Axel had come to in his own way - the Nobody, without a heart way - love, driving him slowly, quickly insane and-

" Axel? " Demyx's voice.

Axel's head snapped up at the blond who had just walked in the door, expecting someone like Xenmas or Siax to walk in and kill him on the spot; not gentle, quiet Demyx. Axel stared for a moment, unable to comprehend why they were going to make Demyx carry out the job of execution when he felt the slippery, velvet feel of another tear sliding unbidden down his cheek. With a slight tint of red to his cheeks, embarrassment at being caught in such a sentimental mood, he averted his gaze, turning his head and reaching up to flip the hood of his black Organization XIII cloak up over his flaming red hair, the expanse of the hood casting a long shadow over his face. He spoke bitterly, not quite meaning his words, though after, he could hardly retract them.

" Do what you came to do and get it over with, so you can go back to playing the good little pet already. "

Silence reigned in the room, despite his words, however. For what had to be several minutes, Demyx just stood there, not a word coming from normally smiling lips. Sure, Axel knew he was about to die, but the anticipation... the trying to keep himself steadied and ready... Roxas...

Axel flung himself off the bed, standing threateningly toward Demyx, his hands clenched into tight fists at his side; his sudden motion had sent his hood flying off his head, and revealed emerald eyes filled with the liquid fire of blame and anger, which he directed solely on Demyx, standing in the doorway.

" What the HELL do you WANT FROM ME? An APOLOGY? I was trying to BRING him BACK! "

" Axel... "

" NEVERMIND the fact that the rest of you SCREW UPS did NOTHING about Roxas! "

" Axel. "

" But if you want to PUNISH me for doing something YOU GUYS should have been doing in the first place, - "

" Axel! "

" - At least have the dignity to do it and GET IT OVER WITH! "

" AXEL! "

" WHAT? "

Demyx raised both of his hands, palms outward and near his chest in a helpless, no-harm-meant motion, still looking at Axel with a pitying gaze, like one might look at a homeless child. He paused again, and Axel was about to continue with his rage before Demyx finally spoke, his words bringing Axel's words; and mind; to a skidding halt.

" You're not going to die. "

Demyx paused again, almost hesitating, though if Axel hadn't been so dumbfounded by the sudden realization that they weren't going to kill him, he might have wondered if the male before him wasn't trying to let his words sink in. After a few moments of silence, Axel's fists slowly unclenching to hang limply at his sides, Demyx continued.

" Boss says that he's willing to ... " He used air quotes, " 'Forgive your transgressions'... as long as you're willing to continue after Roxas. Bring him back, at any cost. "

Axel simply stood there for a moment, the offer that Demyx brought him not quite registering to begin with, but as the idea took hold.. being able to chase after Roxas, unhindered by the Organization...

" Count on it; Got it memorized? "

* End Flashback *

Standing up, Axel glanced forward at the bed he'd laid Sora down in. Hands clenched into fists, he tried to keep the bone chilling shrieks Sora had made when he'd come up for air from the boiling water. Bringing his fists up to where he could see them, Axel fought to unclench them, only to find his hands were shaking horribly. How could he do such a thing...? Once more glancing at the bed, Axel was thankful that he'd finally gotten control of his rage enough to whisk Sora out of the tub; leaving his body with only minor scalded skin here and there, though his flesh was mostly red. This of course, would wear off.

Soon.

Ish.

Axel heaved a heavy sigh, a large shudder wracking it's way through his body before he made a grave, quick motion of his right hand, shoving it in a fist toward his cheek, where it collided heavily, twisting his neck slightly and sending a large jolt of stinging pain through his head. Tears threatened to spill over his emerald hues again, as his hand raised itself back in the same position. But instead of hitting himself, the hand slowly descended to his cheek, cupping and cradling what was probably now a bone-deep bruise.

'Why... why...? He's so close... and you just want to... throw it all away... ' Axel thought to himself, his form still wracked by slight shudders. But his thoughts continued on. ' What if you killed him...? Then Roxas would really be gone forever... Never again to speak Axel's name... no more Cerulean eyes looking at him with deep feeling... no more soft, pliant lips... '

" ... No one will miss me. "

The words fluttered through his mind, a ghost sound from his past that had always haunted him. Axel felt his knees go weak, bending and buckling under the pressure of his weight.

All that was left of the memory was the shadow of Roxas' cloak, swishing behind him until the darkness swallowed him whole.

Both hands were on Axel's head now, clenching hard enough in flaming hair to pull some of his locks out.

* Flashback *

" Axel. Roxas has been returned to Sora. "

" WHAT? "

Axel's jaw dropped in shock; could that even happen? ... stupid question. Sora had still been alive. Technically, even though Nobodies in general weren't supposed to exist... Roxas /Really/ hadn't meant to exist at all... Axel's emerald hues dimmed, the light of hope fading from them as he listened to Marluxia.

" I've been sent to call you off the search; there's no point now. Roxas will never return. "

" You're wrong. "

Even from where he stood, Axel could hear all the emotion go out of his tone. His voice was cold, now. Harsh... piercing. But he didn't care. Roxas was his world... he wouldn't accept that had been taken from him.

" You're wrong, Marluxia. "

" Look, we know how much he meant to you; he was a great asset to the Organization, too. But now that he's - "

Axel exploded.

" HE'S NOT GONE, OKAY? How DARE you talk about Roxas as just being an ASSET for their DAMN plans! He was MORE than that! HE STILL IS, and I'm going to PROVE it to you! "

" Axel, you're being unrational; you need to - "

" SHUT THE HELL UP. I DON'T TAKE ORDERS FROM YOU. I'LL SHOW YOU ROXAS IS STILL HERE! "

Axel turned sharply, his chest heaving breathlessly, as he stalked toward a huge oval of shadows that had expanded upward upon his unspoken command, planning to escape into the corridors of Darkness for a while, but he didn't move fast enough. Marluxia's voice flowed over his ears just as he disappeared from the castle.

" You won't reach him. You never will. "

* End Flashback *

Axel had collapsed upon the stone floor in grief, his tears marking the bitter pain that crushed his lungs and knotted his throat. The hurting just wouldn't cease, no matter what... neither would the voices of the past, or the memories that haunted his sleeping and waking moments... Not a single moment passed by without some reminder of his beloved Roxas... and how untouchable he was. With tears streaming down his face, his dark purple, upside down teardrop paintings on his face almost washed away, Axel found the little strength he had left to stand, shakily though it was.

He couldn't take it anymore. He just... couldn't. It was too much... All he wanted was his Roxas back...

" Roxas... "

Slowly, ever so slowly, Axel brought himself to the bedside, flopping down beside the unconscious body of Sora.

He was tired... so very tired...

But he couldn't sleep yet. Not without one last kiss. Axel knew by now that it was just Sora's body.. with Sora alone... but if he closed his eyes... and pretended really hard... he could still feel Roxas' lips moving underneath his... So it was with one final, spent motion of Axel's that he heaved himself over Sora's reddened body, and tenderly pressed their lips together. And for that one, special moment, it was as though Roxas was there again, lying beneath him in their cuddling embrace, his lips gently gliding over Axel's own, seeking heat. Roxas' lips parted, and without a moment's hesitation, Axel slipped his tongue down into the warm depths of Roxas' mouth, reveling in the taste of sweetness it brought him.

Roxas shifted beneath Axel, his hands coming to Axel's chest to lay there, tenderly, over Axel's peaked nipples, causing Axel to moan quietly into the younger's mouth. But then in one moment, the peace of the moment was shattered; Roxas turned his head to the side, spitting and gasping in fresh air. The hands at Axel's chest became pushy, frantic, and Axel's pleasure lidded eyes slipped further down, no longer under the illusion he was with his Roxas. Instead... he panged with the pain of loss... all over again. Rolling over, Axel laid on his side, not even watching Sora, but listening to the sounds of him squirming to the opposite side of the bed, sitting up and bringing the covers up as far as he could to cover his naked torso and neck...

Axel knew Sora would make another run for it. But before he did...

" Here. " Axel's voice seemed to stop Sora for a moment, which Axel took advantage of. Without opening his eyes, he reached into one of the pockets on the inside of his cloak, taking out a rather menacing looking dagger, which he gripped by the blade, heedless as to how it cut smoothly through his glove and into his flesh, the black becoming darker, slicker, with the presence of blood. He held it out to Sora, who still didn't move, though Axel heard his breathing quicken.

Before he lost him, Axel continued.

" Get it over with. Kill me. You'll be free then... "

Silence, but after a moment, the dagger was taken from his hand.

Seconds later, Axel heard the clang of the dagger on the stone floor, and finally found it in him to open his eyes.

XXX

Sora stared with wild eyes at the dagger being offered to him by Axel, already seeing the dark stain appearing on his glove where the blade cut deep.

" Get it over with. Kill me. You'll be free then... "

Sora could do nothing but stare. The person of his woes... of his nightmares, asking him to kill him. Giving him his freedom back. Lips parted in silent shock, with shaking hands, Sora carefully took the dagger away from Axel, who lowered his hand onto the bed in a defeated motion. He was just... giving up.

Giving up.

Something inside Sora boiled at those words.

Axel never gave up.

* Roxas' Point of View *

With a narrowing of his cerulean eyes, Roxas tossed the dagger over the side of the bed, reveling in the satisfying clang it made as it hit the stone floor. Seconds later, Axel opened his emerald hues, and Roxas made sure to stare him down.

" If you ever ask that again, I will stab you; just not in a place you can die from. "

With a growing satisfaction in the pit of his stomach, Roxas watched Axel's eyes widen, energy starting to fill his form back up again. Axel hefted himself up onto his elbows, before sitting up completely, staring at Roxas like he'd never seen him before. Roxas had no idea if he still shared Sora's appearance or not, but right now, he could care less.

" Roxas... is that - "

Roxas didn't wait for Axel to finish; with a crushing grip, Roxas' hands came around Axel's neck and pulled him inward, their lips clashing in a sudden torrent of passion and need.

The curling satisfaction in the pit of Roxas' stomach quickly melted to lust. Axel's hands came around his flame stroked body, heated with the want of the man above him, and pushed him down onto the bed, their lips still locked in a battle to the death. Neither came up for air, even when the clothes came off. Nor when fingers roamed. Finally however, the two had to break away, each for a gasp of fresh air, as Roxas' hand found Axel's hardened, throbbing member, and Axel's probing fingers found Roxas' puckered hole. With gentle, smooth motions, both hands started working, tormenting and satisfying the other with tender caresses, working each other up to the point of frenzied lust.

Roxas' body was already bucking upward, wanting the male above him, and as such, the hand that was gripped firmly around the base of Axel's member tried to pull him toward his rounded bottom, where Axel's fingers were still stretching him, splaying him wide open and ready. No words were needed between the two; Roxas felt the fingers leave him the second Axel crushed their lips back together, and then the rampant, fiery pleasure as Roxas could feel Axel's member thrusting fully, deeply inside of him.

How long had it been since he'd felt the pleasure that only Axel could give him...?

Roxas moaned deeply into the crushing mouth upon him, his arms coming around Axel's form and holding him tightly, closely, relishing the feel of heated flesh upon scorching skin. Roxas' hips bucked upward in time with each and every one of Axel's thrusts, his legs coming around Axel's hips and locking tightly there, trying to help him go deeper, until...

There.

With a lust filled gasp, Roxas broke away from the kiss, his head lolling back, his entire body shuddering heavily; Axel was right on his prostate with every thrust of his, and damn it was making his entire body weak. Roxas fought between his uncontrollable moans and quaking shivers to keep his grip upon the male before him, going so far as to dig his fingernails into Axel's back to try and keep hold, though it became even harder when Axel took advantage of Roxas' open neck from the way he'd slammed his head down toward the pillow. Another pleasure filled gasp, followed by a high pitched moan, and Roxas half flailed beneath Axel. Roxas could feel the speed of Axel's thrusts coming a bit faster than before, but it wasn't nearly what he needed Now.

With each panting gasp came a high pitched, need filled moan, Roxas' fingernails became downright lethal claws, digging fiercely into Axel's back to the point they drew blood, not that Roxas noticed.

Not that Axel even noticed.

Quickly, the high pitched moans transformed into pleasure filled screams, filling the stone room and echoing around the two. Axel joined in, his sensuous, deep moans in perfect harmony with the rapturous, throat burning screams, their bodies quivering and shoving themselves against the other until finally, Roxas' abused prostate sent a final, bone shattering wave of pleasure over him as it was thrust against, sending Roxas, screaming Axel's name, into his orgasm, his entire body clenching and shaking.

Which in turn, sent Axel over the edge as well, dragging a sharp, moaning gasp from Roxas as Axel's spray of semen hit Roxas' prostate once more. After a few simmering seconds, both were still, Roxas' limbs having lost all will to hang on, falling to the bed below him, and Axel deciding the same, that he simply wanted to lay there, which put him deliciously limp on top of Roxas. For a few moments, Roxas thought Axel had already drifted to sleep, and so he allowed his heavy lids to close the rest of the way, not minding a wink of sleep himself; but the comment came when he was too far into exhausted sleep that he couldn't answer, but just at the right time that he actually heard and registered Axel's softly spoken,

" ... Thank you, Roxas... I love you... "


	4. Learning to Trust

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Their night of passion is over, and suddenly Roxas disappears behind the veil that is Sora again, and for some reason, it breaks Sora's heart to see Axel hurting so deeply over this being called Roxas. They attempt to forge a bond, but when emotions run high, sometimes, you have to walk before you can run.

Sora awoke with a throbbing headache, but a blissful relaxing feeling in his limbs and a strange, bone deep warmth that filled him to his core. It took him several, delicious moments to take in that he was actually waking up from what seemed like the most wonderful dream he'd ever had, only for a sudden shock of icy cold realization to set in. Still in the dreaded bed in the cold, stone room that Axel had forced him to stay in, Sora was once more spooned in what he couldn't help but admit was a nice feeling and slightly arousing position. Axel's arm was draped over his midsection, possessively and protectively all at the same time.

Slight snores were coming from the redhead, deep and relaxed; the snoring of a deep, relaxing sleep. If Sora was careful, he didn't have to disturb Axel. All he had to do was gently, ever so slowly, slip his arm off his stomach and he was free. The door was still slightly ajar, casting a bit more light into the room than there really ever was, and all the freedom in the world was beckoning Sora to make a run for it. So why did his head hurt so much all of a sudden? What was this... heaviness in his arms and legs that made it near impossible to move? This, this... fluttering of his heart; it wasn't normal. It wasn't good. He had to get out of there.

Forcing himself to move, it was with a slightly jerky motion that Sora finally brought his right arm up, slowly getting used to the feeling of using it normally again. His muscles were strained, throbbing, and yet... he felt so insanely /good/, it seemed a crime to even want to move, no matter the situation. Regardless, Sora's hand came down on Axel's. He'd been wrong about Axel's snores; evidently, the loudest ones were the ones he made when he was so close to waking. Sora stiffened his entire body up as much as he could, trying - and failing - to pretend he was still asleep.

But Axel gave a groggy moan and yawn, his own body stiffening, but with the usual morning stretch given, which pressed him completely up against Sora's back side. Sora tried to bite back a whimper, being horrifically reminded of all the other times he'd woken up like this with the crazy redhead, threatening to rape him if he didn't give him Roxas, or worse. Today seemed no different, with the way Axel's arm gripped Sora at his waist and pulled him back further, into what Sora had to assume to be Axel's morning wood. This time, he couldn't help the soft, pitiful whimper that escaped his lips, and caused Axel's form to stiffen for real this time.

" ... Roxas...? "

Sora found himself being bodily turned over by Axel, who had raised himself onto his elbows to a point where he could more easily examine his face. Sora kept his gaze turned away however, even when he heard the gut-wrenching question, more like a plea, from Axel.

" Please... Roxas...? "

Silence passed heavily between the two for what felt like the longest time. But then, finally, Axel questioned in a defeated tone,

" ... Sora...? "

And Sora had to glance back, his cerulean eyes meeting tearful emerald ones. For a split second, Sora thought that by answering to his own name, he'd somehow help Axel with his insane delusion that he was someone else; but no. All it did was show Sora how truly distraught Axel was, what with the tears blooming over the sides of his cheeks, casting their slick tracks over the smooth, pale flesh, only to drip a few seconds later in cold, small splashes onto Sora's nude torso below Axel. Axel spoke again, slowly moving to sit back, away from Sora.

" ... Why... "

Axel's hands rose to his head, where they covered his face completely, his elbows resting crookedly and probably painfully on his knees, his entire body clenching like he was heaving. Crying. Sora started at this realization, and tried to sit up. He knew he should be taking advantage of this moment; the door was still open! But instead, he felt rooted to the spot. Not just unable to move, but... unwilling. Axel was paining... because of him. Somehow... in all his abused nature... that just didn't seem right. Axel wailed on.

" ... Why...? Three years of pain for one night of Roxas... it's not fair... it's just not FAIR! "

Sora cringed at Axel's last, yelled word, but he maneuvered himself onto all fours, crawling across the expanse of the bed to get to where Axel was sitting, his head still buried in his hands, tears leaking through the cracks in his fingers. Sora was used to cowering in fear of Axel's anger, but somehow, something told him that right now, the one who needed comfort the most was actually Axel.

It was with that thought that Sora's hand hesitatingly came down on Axel's shoulder, which seemed to cause the older male's breath to hitch a level. Axel slowly took his hands from his face, and craned his neck to look over his shoulder at Sora. As he did so, Sora was able to see the fresh, salty tear tracks which had completely obliterated his upside down tear mark face paintings, leaving his cheeks pale and wet. Reluctantly and hesitatingly, Sora gave in against his better judgment and took the hand that he'd laid upon Axel's shoulder and raised it to Axel's cheek, gently brushing away some of the tears there, even though new tears marked fresh paths seconds later.

" ... I- I may not be Roxas... " Sora spoke softly, with a hitch in his voice and a tone that made it sound like for some reason, he was on the verge of tears himself, although he couldn't for the life of him fathom why, " ... But... it hurts... to see you beating yourself up over it. Wh- What can I do... to... To make it stop...? "

Axel's emerald eyes seemed to become infinitely sadder as they focused slowly on Sora through the tears that had to be blurring his vision, but the raw emotion held within them only seemed to shred Sora's heartstrings. Sora dropped his shaking hand into his lap where he now knelt beside Axel, with the male still staring at him with that gut wrenching look. Sora could feel tears prick at the corners of his cerulean hues for an odd, still unknown reason; sure he had always cared about everyone but Axel? That was just... pushing it. Especially after these past three years, but for some reason... he just couldn't help it. No matter how much the other male grossed him out, made him do things he despised, and acted like everything was just... alright.

It was too much. Sora gulped down a fresh breath of air, inhaling deeply and steeling himself for what he'd already come to the decision he was going to do, and leant forward, placing his arms around Axel's slightly heaving form, obviously catching the redhead off guard, because Axel stiffened slightly. But the second Sora's head tilted upward, their lips just inches away from each other, Axel slowly but surely dipped his head downward to meet the brunette's soft, pliant lips. It was a tender, reluctant kiss, one that neither first seemed intent on doing, let alone keeping up, but there was just something in the kiss; a spark. That ignited both of their flames.

Axel, drunk with his pain and still reeling from the shocking realization that he'd only gotten one night with his Roxas before Sora had thrown himself back into Axel's life, which was becoming nothing but a huge, black void of yearning and pain, allowed his lips to tenderly move over Sora's own. Seeking, but reserved. For the first time in three years, Axel allowed himself the realization that it was Sora that he was kissing, and not his beloved Roxas. There was something different in the way they did things, Axel allowed himself to learn, even as both of his hands came tentatively around Sora's lithe body, pulling him closer and closer, until their forms were pressed as close together as their physical forms would allow and then some.

Axel pressed his lips down harder on Sora's own even as he thought dimly to himself that Roxas wasn't afraid to meet his kisses, the strokes of his tongue or the thrusts of his hips; Sora, on the other hand, seemed hesitant, and reluctant to do much but just sit there in Axel's arms and let him have his way with him. But Axel knew from experience, whether it was Roxas showing through or just Sora's inner, hidden feelings, that if he just tweaked right here... -

Axel's left hand slipped away from Sora's back, reaching between their bodies to find Sora's beaded nipple and gently slipping it between his forefinger and thumb to pull and twist tenderly. Sora gasped, his lips parting with the motion as he arched his upper body into Axel's touch.

\- and if he slipped in his tongue...

Axel's tongue gently pushed it's way past the lips that had opened in Sora's gasping motion, only to feel the reverberations of Sora's moan filling his entire mouth. Sora seemed to shudder a few times before leaning more heavily against Axel's entire form as a delicious sounding moan slipped from the invaded mouth.

\- he'd melt. Which he did. Axel couldn't help a small smile to himself; it was hard not to compare the two... but for this one time... he had to knock all thoughts of Roxas from his mind. ... If Roxas was just going to abandon him to this... this boy... then Axel would let him. And have his fun while he was at it. Maybe... maybe there would even be something more in it for him, despite his earlier actions these past three years. Maybe he had a chance.

Maybe.

XXX

Sora lay beside a sleeping Axel, his body still tingling heavily from the actions of the past few hours. It was hard to deny himself the pleasure that his body obviously felt from such vile acts, but by this point, Sora's will had run dry. Having already accepted that this was his fate, there was nothing left to do but just... give in. Still, last night stayed fresh in his mind, slowing the satisfaction that was coursing through each and every one of his limbs; for some reason, it was more difficult to get the image of Axel's tears out of his mind than it was Axel's rage. And that was insanely dangerous, Sora reminded himself, even as the red-head shifted slightly in his sleep beside him, an arm and leg thrown over Sora's body both possessively and protectively as always.

That door, constantly taunting Sora with the light it shed into the room through the crack that came from it being left partially open, had kept Sora awake in turmoil long after Axel had passed out. Tears pricked at the edges of Sora's eyes as his thoughts continued tumbling around; he couldn't understand why after three years of abuse and rape, his body was refusing to obey his wishes to just run away and never look back. He couldn't understand why he allowed himself to give in to Axel last night, and yet... he couldn't fathom why Axel had looked so... broken.

The image of Axel's tears flashed through Sora's mind once more, and with a quiet groan of frustration, Sora cursed himself and the taunting, opened door. He turned over, toward Axel, only to curl up quietly in the embrace of the crazy red-head. Slowly, he forced his eyes closed, knowing that he would need sleep if he was to attempt to help Axel in any way...

Sora felt Axel's arms slowly and lightly constrict around his form in a gentle embrace, and Sora resisted the urge to sigh. Half from frustration, and yet... half from contentment. Sora had to admit, Axel's arms were very comforting, just as the red-head's body was insanely warm. Gently, Sora snuggled a little further into Axel's arms, knowing it wouldn't take but a few seconds for sleep to find him. ... What was he getting himself into?

XXX

Unbeknownst to Sora, Axel was just as awake as he was, laying beside him with a heavy heart that kept him from moving his arm or leg that he had thrown over the smaller boy possessively. Axel was fighting off two different urges; one that said he'd never see his Roxas again and to just give up trying, and one that said maybe he could still get through to Roxas if he gave Sora a chance. Despite how things had gone last night, Axel's mind was still filled with Sora's constant pleas throughout the past three years, the rest of the Organization's ideas of what Axel was doing that they kept trying to drill in his head, and Axel's own worries after so long of not being able to get through to him. The moment he had seen Sora again instead of his Roxas... it had crushed him. So horribly had it crushed him, and Axel could still feel that painful weight on his heart, keeping him from moving off Sora.

He felt tears prickle at his eyes again as he began to make his decision about what he was going to do, but the moment his brain kicked into gear, he was stopped cold. Sora, the boy that Axel had kidnapped, raped, held in the worst circumstances and very possibly abused... curled into him. Axel's eyes opened and widened, but he kept his body intensely still, so as to not scare Sora away. Unsure what to think, Axel found his thoughts melting somewhat, and Axel himself was convinced in that one moment. He would never be over his Roxas, and he would never stop comparing Sora and Roxas together. So even if in the end, Axel couldn't have his Roxas...

Then he would attempt to fall in love with Sora instead. Slowly, Axel found his arms wrapping a little tighter around the smaller form laying beside him, but he made sure not to embrace him too tight, afraid of ruining the moment that Sora had made. So Axel was relieved when Sora snuggled a little further into his arms, his cheek pressed closely to Axel's chest. In fact, relieved didn't quite come into play; besides last night after falling asleep with Roxas in his arms, snuggled just like Sora was now, Axel had to admit he was happy.

Axel, moments before he himself fell asleep, made a promise to himself; he would keep Sora happy from here on out, and stop treating him like just a barrier to get past. He would try to be happy with Sora, and hope... that even after all those years... that Sora might actually begin to love him back.

With hope in his heavy heart, Axel fell asleep with his arms around Sora, the two in a tentative lovers' embrace.


	5. Out of the Shadows... and Into the Shadows.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Love is blooming between Axel and Sora, with many-a-late night night rendezvous to help them along. But there's always something -Someone- lurking in the shadows, waiting for the right moment to strike. When a long ignored, jealous person enters the fray, what will happen to the slowly growing happiness both Axel and Sora are trying so hard to keep?

Axel seemed… lighter, Demyx observed. Not quite back to his old, bubbly self, but getting there.

Demyx rested his chin in the palm of his hands, his elbows propped up on a brick wall in Twilight Town, his gaze focused upward toward the Clock Tower where Axel and Sora sat. There was still a lot of tension in the air between the two, Demyx could tell, and yet there they sat, talking and sharing Sea-Salt Ice Cream together. Demyx found himself thinking back over the past two months, ever since Axel began allowing Sora more freedom out of that labyrinth. Demyx had been absolutely sure that Sora would make a break for it; that he would run and that would be that, and Axel would go back to being normal again. But… it hadn't happened that way.

No; for some reason, the two seemed to be actually getting on lately. Demyx could still tell there was strain in Sora's face as he laughed, probably to one of Axel's many jokes, but… they seemed to be trying. Demyx found his own eyes narrowing just slightly at the thought. Things hadn't gone the way he'd hoped they would: Axel was supposed to find Sora could never give him back Roxas, and Axel was supposed to give up on Sora, either releasing him or killing him; Demyx hadn't cared which, so long as Sora was out of the picture. But now… it was looking like things had taken a turn for the worse, and somehow Axel and Sora had begun to attempt a friendship. Or even worse than that; they were attempting to fall in love with each other.

With that thought, the usually smiling Demyx spat toward his side, onto the ground, and turned his head away from the clock tower, too disgusted to watch anymore. It wasn't fair. Three years, he had waited for his turn. Five years he had lived in the shadows of Roxas.

No more.

XXX

Sweet, yet salty, the flavour reminded Sora of that one night when he had actually tasted Axel's tears. Still, they hadn't been as cold as the ice cream that lingered on his lips. Sora's mind still lingered on those nights, despite the time that had passed since then. Axel had become… somewhat pleasant to be around; but it was obvious it was forced, like if he didn't try to be that way, he might return to being the abusive red-head Sora had learned to fear. It was that thought that sent a shiver down Sora's spine, despite the beautiful horizon sun-set that set the sky aflame with reds and purples. Still, even Sora had to admit that things seemed to somehow be falling into place; even sitting so far off the ground with his legs dangling over the edge of the clock tower wasn't frightening. It was… familiar, almost like he had been here so many times before; especially when Axel was here.

Because when Axel was here, he would constantly attempt to joke with Sora, but some of those jokes had a certain ring of… of Déjà vu to them, and seemed to stir something deep within Sora, making him laugh a little harder than he would normally. Sora couldn't fully understand it, but it was like there was a subtle reaction within him to Axel, and in ways that words bubbled past his mouth without his conscious thought of them, Sora wondered if it wasn't somehow this… this Roxas within him that Axel was constantly trying to get to. Then, there was the way that Axel reacted to those strange quips that floated past his lips without him noticing; almost every time his emerald eyes would beam with pure joy, and his smile would float higher, wider. His laugh would become more of a melody that seemed to constantly set Sora's cheeks aflame, and yet… he seemed so boyish when he laughed like that. So… normal, so…

Sora quickly shook his head, returning his gaze to the red sun that hung on the horizon, slowly setting. His thoughts were taking dangerous turns as of late, and that wasn't good at all. Or was it? Sora had told himself he would attempt to love Axel… but the thought still seemed so wrong and so right at the same time. It was confusing in more ways than one, and set off a headache that always seemed to plague Sora whenever he thought too hard about his situation. Axel… with eyes that shined like emeralds themselves… and hair as red as the setting sun…

"Hey, you're early!"

The voice behind him made Sora jump slightly as he twisted his upper body around, his sapphire eyes falling on Axel's emerald ones. For a singular moment, his heart skipped again, but for a different reason than surprise, and just like it had been happening so often lately, the words literally fell from Sora's lips before he could quell them.

"No. You're just late."

In that moment, Axel's face beamed, and just that look sent a shiver down Sora's spine, his breath catching in his throat. Sora quickly turned his head back toward the horizon, feeling his cheeks colour heavily as he listened to Axel move over and plop down beside him. The two sat in silence, thankfully, which allowed Sora to attempt to control the heat that had made itself known in his face. After a few minutes, however, Sora's ears picked up the sound of Axel's voice, light and happy sounding; far happier than Sora had ever heard him before.

"If you don't eat the rest of that, it's going to melt."

It took Sora a few seconds to realize that Axel was talking about the half eaten Sea-Salt Ice Cream that he was holding in his hand, slowly dripping downward, toward the ground, falling into tiny, indistinct splotches on the ground that, from this distance, neither Sora nor Axel could see. His gaze centered on the ice cream, watching it for a few seconds before simply holding it out for Axel, attempting one of his own smiles, though he knew it didn't even challenge Axel's.

"Here. I can't eat anymore anyway. You like this flavour too, don't you?"

For a moment, it looked as though Sora's comment had taken Axel by surprise, before the red-head chuckled quietly and reached his hand forward, his warm fingers brushing Sora's own as he took hold of the half eaten ice cream. Sora's eyes widened at the brush of flesh and the subsequent shiver and goose bumps that followed, only serving to re-ignite the flaming colour in Sora's cheeks. Sora looked away quickly again, but he had a feeling that Axel had caught it that time, due to the quiet chuckling that only seemed to make it worse. It did make Sora feel a little better though, to hear Axel take a bite of the ice cream moments before he began talking, as if to fill the silence.

"Yeah, I like the Sea-Salt flavour as well, but not as much as Roxas does. He always went crazy over this stuff."

Axel paused for a moment, taking a few more bites and perhaps mulling over something in his mind. Slowly, the silence began to shift from being moderately uncomfortable to being… well… easier to stand, in Sora's thinking. Hearing the birds in the background, the gentle sounds of the breeze against his face, the glow that was slowly fading darker and darker… it all seemed so… peaceful. So it came as a small shock when Sora suddenly felt a hand upon his cheek, despite how infinitely gentle it was. He knew the moment he flinched away from Axel's hand that it was the wrong thing to do, because when he looked back towards the red-head, there was still a smile on his face, but a saddened, heartbroken one that seemed to wrench Sora's gut in knots.

Axel's hand lowered back toward the ice cream stick he held, fiddling with the now clean stick before he spoke quietly, the sky darkening slowly with the passing time.

"… I found a 'winner' stick."

At Sora's confused look, Axel continued quietly, without looking back toward Sora.

"… Roxas gave me one of these ice cream sticks as a parting gift when he left the Organization. It was a 'winner' too."

Sora felt his heart melting again; the look on Axel's face was just so heart wrenching that Sora almost couldn't stand it. Trying to fight himself, Sora found himself moving a bit closer to Axel until their shoulders bumped, gaining Axel's attention again. For a long moment, Sora was silent, not really knowing what to say and having to search for his words, before he finally uttered out,

"… Look. I'm not Roxas. But… he meant a lot to you, and… maybe…"

Sora bit his lower lip, wondering if he really wanted to say it, but unlike before, the words wouldn't just 'spill' from his lips. No, it took so much effort to get them out, that afterwards, his palms felt clammy with sweat.

"… Maybe I can too?"

Sora held his breath; he knew he shouldn't have said anything. Axel was just staring at him now, his gaze darker now that the sun had finally set, casting his entire face into shadows even as Sora quickly glanced around at the sky, searching for the moon but unable to find its familiar light. Another shiver settled over Sora's shoulders as he waited for Axel's answer, most of his abused body wondering if Axel would hurt him now that he had offered to take over Roxas' place instead of just 'being' Roxas. So when Axel's voice sounded out around him again, calling his name, he jumped again, earning another small bout of silence and forcing Sora to return his gaze to Axel, unable to stand not knowing what the red-head was doing.

It was in that moment that Axel's hand once more came down on Sora's cheek; his flesh so radiantly warm against Sora's flushed cheeks, as Axel's fingers slipped under Sora's chin, hooking around it and tilting his face marginally upward, just in the perfect position for Axel's lips to descend on his own. Unable to help it, Sora felt a soft, contented sigh slip past his lips as Axel drifted away from the kiss, his fingers still splayed underneath Sora's chin. For a few moments, the two merely locked gazes, sapphire hues filled with doubt and repressed yearning, and emerald hues fixed with a pure, heated longing; a gaze that sent shivers up and down Sora's spine until he could take it no more.

Sora's own hand came upward, tentatively toward Axel's chest where he wrapped his hand in the top portion of Axel's cloak, insanely warm from his body heat and sending more goose bumps down Sora's arm. As if in instinct, Axel wrapped his other hand around Sora, bringing them closer together, holding him tightly and causing Sora to almost melt into the heat that suddenly surrounded him in a blissful state, keeping him from being startled at the sudden sensation of his body being lifted off the ledge of the Clock Tower, and being carried inside, where the wind couldn't get at them.

Sora's eyelids felt heavy, pulled down by the warmth that surrounded him and the sharp spikes of his heart that sent pangs of wanting through his entire body. It had been hard, but Sora had attempted to abandon his distaste for the acts that Axel did to him; when he did them gently, after all it felt… well… it felt really good. His body had come to anticipate every single touch, every whisper, every heated gaze that sent his entire body into shivers, like the one Axel now locked him with. Sora felt himself being sat down on the floor, even as Axel leaned over him, straddling Sora's lower body and causing Sora's breath to hitch seconds before their lips locked again.

Unable to help it, Sora threw his arms around Axel's neck, surrendering himself to the sensations, and the man himself.

XXX

Axel's lips curled upward into a smirk, even against the blonde's lips, feeling the sensation of Sora's arms around his neck so keenly. He knew he shouldn't, but it just felt so natural to close his eyes and pretend that Sora was his Roxas; they moved the same, sounded the same… smelled the same… Axel deepened the kiss at that thought, his breath hitching a little as he felt Sora moan into the kiss.

Damn… if he acted like this, Axel was going to find it hard to restrain himself.

'Take it slow, Axel. Nice and easy.' he told himself, even as he could feel his own body losing that battle.

He placed his hands on either side of Sora's shoulders, lowering himself fully onto the boy, his body igniting to the quiet, mewling whimper that Roxas always used to make whenever Axel was teasing him. The sound went right to Axel's head and before he could calm himself, his hands were instantly underneath Sora's shirt, pulling the fabric upwards and over his head, exposing his pale flesh and beaded nipples to Axel's hungry gaze. Seconds later Sora's left nipple had been captured by Axel's lips, causing the boy to wriggle and moan loudly at the tongue that tenderly caressed the hardened nub, which only fueled Axel's movements, driving him to higher lengths as his hands caressed down the sides of Sora's flesh, toward his trousers.

Sora's body wiggled underneath Axel, his hips bucking into Axel's own and causing him to stifle his own moan against Sora's nipple, which made the younger boy's movements more wanton. Axel grunted, panting for breath as he forced himself off of Sora's nipple, his hands hastily attempting to undo the buttons on Sora's trousers.

'This is getting bad…' his thoughts tumbled around in his mind. 'If he keeps up like this…'

Axel's hands were already shaking with the fire Sora had awakened in him, and if anything else-

"Aa-xe-el!"

That was all it took; that moan had sounded so much like Roxas, it both broke Axel's non-existent heart and somehow set it aflame all at once. His fingers weren't worried about just undoing Sora's trousers anymore; they ripped them off of Sora's lower half, tossing them and Sora's boxers across the Clock Tower floor at once, causing the blonde to shudder in the cold as it hit him. But Axel wouldn't let the cold be Sora's only company, because the next moment Axel's hands had come down over Sora's thighs, lifting them over his shoulders as he worked himself free as quickly as possible while still managing to crush the smaller form to his own.

It was harder than ever for Axel to concentrate, as Sora seemed to insist on making the very same moans and whimpers that Roxas would do every time their love-making got too passionate, too out of control, and it would only make things worse- and better at the same time.

It set Axel's entire body on fire; and in a few moments, that fire captured the two of them.

XXX

Axel sat back on his calves, watching Sora out of worried emerald eyes; but Sora didn't seem to be angry at him. Instead, Sora actually seemed very relaxed; maybe he did just want to enjoy the last vestiges of the night then. After all, Roxas had always enjoyed coming up here. It was Roxas' favourite place to come and clear his head, and perhaps Sora had the same inclination. So it wasn't so hard for Axel to finally accept, even as he leant forward again, wrapping Sora in a quick, warm hug. It felt so good having finally stayed out a full night away from that labyrinth, and even better knowing that Sora was beginning to trust him a lot more than he had before.

As Axel then stood up, he gave Sora a winning smile before stepping backward, into the sudden portal of shadows that rose up behind him at his call; within seconds, he was gone from the Clock Tower, reappearing in his and Rox- well. His and Sora's room, now. The stumble in his thoughts caused the smile on Axel's lips to falter, and for a moment, he wondered what he was doing, leaving Sora on his own. Sure, the blonde had asked for some time alone to enjoy a morning of freedom, but would he have done the same if it were his Roxas asking the same favour?

A smile was brought to Axel's lips as the answer came instantly to his mind; yes, he would leave Roxas alone. Or pretend to, when really he would just go away for about half an hour before returning and sitting unnoticed in the shadows until Roxas called him out.

So it was settled then. A half hour from now, Axel would rejoin his blonde, and see how long it took Sora to notice him like Roxas always did.

XXX

The wind was blowing a lot more sharply against Sora's face, whipping his hair back into his face even as the first few signs of the sunrise began to peer over the horizon. Sora's head was swimming with thoughts, none of which he could properly pin down. He had told himself he would try to fall in love with Axel, and yet, the process of actually doing that seemed a lot more confusing than originally thought. His heart tugged at him every time Axel watched him out of those emerald gems, and last night…

Sora shivered, wrapping his arms around his torso, but not because of the cold wind. If he was honest with himself, he was actually beginning to fall for the man who had kidnapped him. Three years ago, when Axel had first taken him and locked him in that room, he had resented the man; swore he would never forgive him. Hell, Sora had attempted to fight his way out so many times until the fight just… went out of him.

He couldn't give Axel Roxas, because… as far as Sora knew, there wasn't a Roxas. It was just… him. But like he had told Axel earlier last night, maybe… maybe that would be enough. Maybe Sora could make it be enough for Axel; maybe-

A familiar sound crept into Sora's ears; a tiny 'vompf' sound that the shadows made whenever Axel called them forth. Had Axel come back to get him? Slowly, almost happily, Sora found his lips curving upward into a smile; maybe Axel really was coming to care about him, and not just the Roxas he thought Sora was hiding. Sora began to turn, turning his head to look over his shoulder, waiting to see Axel's smiling face and to hear the joke that would have come as a greeting.

But the only thing that met Sora was a cold, gloved hand over his mouth, startling him as his eyes went wide, feeling another hand came around Sora's midsection. The arms clamped down on him tightly, causing panic to rise in Sora as he realized he couldn't move. There was no heat from the body behind him, unlike when Axel held him; only a piercing chill that ran up Sora's spine. With another 'vompf', everything went black.


	6. Abandonment

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Losing a loved one to death is one thing; losing a loved one to abandonment is another thing entirely. One which Axel and Sora are just starting to learn. But will the shadow of another player really steal the day, or will love manage to bring them back together finally?

The moment the shadows released them, Sora felt himself pushed forward to the point he stumbled outward, finding it too hard to catch his footing and dropping to one knee. Franticly, he turned around; attempting to catch sight of his assailant, but the only thing that greeted him was that infuriating black cloak that the members of Organization XIII had worn. They were still around, after three years…? Sora's eyes narrowed; whoever this was, it wasn't Axel, and they were about to get a piece of Sora's mind. Unfortunately, the male spoke up before Sora got a chance, his words paralyzing Sora to the spot.

"Axel told me to bring you here."

Axel… wanted this? Dread began to blossom in Sora's gut, but the male simply continued, standing in front of Sora.

"He said you weren't worth the hassle anymore. Three years; three whole years he spent trying to bring Roxas out of you, and all you did was selfishly enjoy yourself at Axel's cost."

"I didn't-"

"Who's been feeding you?"

Sora's words caught in his throat as he looked upon the cloaked male, his hood drawn deeply over his eyes so not even a part of his face was showing beneath the shadows. Sora's body had begun shaking slightly, and nothing he could think of was going to stop it. Before Sora could answer, the guy was talking again.

"Axel, that's who. Who's been clothing you? Axel. Who's been housing you? Axel. And just what have you done to make it up to him, hm?"

His mouth was so dry, Sora noticed, looking up at the cloaked man with slightly misting eyes. His breath came out shakily as the dread continued to pool higher and higher in his gut until the fear forced words from Sora's lips in his defense.

"He's the one who kidnapped me in the first place! Why should I make ANYTHING up to him?"

But his remark only caused the man in black to chuckle quietly; the words that came next seemed to freeze Sora's heart over.

"That's why he doesn't want you anymore. He won't miss you. Hell, he won't even realize you're gone."

With that, the man stepped backward, into the shadows that had never faded, and the adrenaline in Sora's body caught up to his train-wreck of a thought process, and he shot up off his knees, toward the man.

"Wait!"

But his comment fell short; with another 'vompf', the shadows closed in on themselves, taking both, the man and Sora's means of escape, with them. Sora fell onto the ground moments later, where the shadows had disappeared from, his entire body heaving. He was alone. Axel didn't want him. Wouldn't even miss him.

"Nobody will miss me."

Sora's heart ached like it had never done before as the words seemed to move through his mind in slow motion. He could all but hear them, like a distant memory, but the tears that welled to his eyes were all too real. The dread that had filled his gut slowly iced over into an emotional pain that staggered his entire body, flopping Sora onto the floor where he simply curled and wept, uncaring of his surroundings.

XXX

Axel slowly opened his eyes, yawning as he stared at the ceiling. The comfy blankets atop the bed he laid on were neatly made, all thanks to Axel having nothing else to do while he waited on Sora. Things were put away, nice and neat, and Axel had been done within the first five minutes, which gave him nothing to do but think. Things were going a lot better, Axel regretfully admitted to himself, linking his hands behind his head, matting his hair to the bed as he lay across it sideways. Better than they had been going before, when Axel was trying to force Roxas out, because no matter how alike Sora and Roxas were in bed… the differences were abundant when they were just being themselves.

Axel frowned at the thought for a moment, once more finding himself going back to compare the two. Roxas… his Roxas… was bolder; if he had something to say, he would say it, and he wasn't afraid to make Axel mad. In fact, more than once, Roxas had attempted to make Axel madder than hell, just for the make-up sex. With a quiet chuckle to himself, Axel relished the fact he had always made Roxas beg for mercy afterwards, though. Still… compared to Sora, who was more quiet and reserved, it was quite a change, to be sure. Sora seemed like he was always afraid to say or do something around Axel, but that was probably because of the past three years Axel had spent with him.

To not let Sora out of his room, to force him to have sex with Axel, to scream and yell and boil him alive… Yeah. That probably didn't help at all. Axel closed his eyes for a moment, a pang of regret sweeping over his form as he continued to think. He probably should have never done any of that, but… even now, he couldn't find it in him to say he would change it if he could. Because everything that Axel had done had led up to that one night that Roxas finally appeared, and gave Axel the hope to continue; and even to change. From then on, it had been more or less touch and go, Axel thought, opening his eyes again and simply staring up at the ceiling as the moments ticked by.

Somehow, he and Sora had come to an unspoken agreement that they would attempt to make this better for everyone involved. Axel was trying his hardest to woo over Sora, but… compared to how Sora had acted toward him before, it was obvious he was trying as well, which caused Axel to smile slightly. If he couldn't have the only Nobody he had ever come to love, then… Roxas' Somebody would be the next best thing, wouldn't it? They're still one in the same, after all… aren't they?

Another yawn passed Axel's lips and finally, he simply couldn't take it anymore. He sat up on the bed, swinging his legs off the other side and standing up to his full height, shaking his head a little to awaken him fully before calling the shadows. As they rose before him, Axel remembered with a small grin the way he and Roxas used to race using the Corridors of Darkness, and made a mental note that maybe he needed to teach Sora how to use them himself. The darkness wrapped around Axel as he stepped through, and it took him less than a second to reappear inside the Clock Tower. As the shadows disappeared behind him, Axel took a deep breath, enjoying the fresh air that blew through the open door as the wind whipped his hair back, away from his face. A rather goofy grin broke over his lips as he entertained the idea of scaring Sora. But Sora wasn't inside the building, which meant he had to be outside, probably sitting on the ledge like Roxas would always do.

For a moment, Axel wavered; he would never be able to stop comparing the two of them, that was for sure. But… as long as Sora didn't mind, things would be okay. That's what Axel told himself, anyway, as he began heading outside, toward the ledge; scaring Sora was no longer on his mind.

"Sora?" he called.

Nothing but the wind answered.

"Sora!"

In that moment, Axel felt something inside him break; his body moved without his meaning it to, even as he shifted closer to the edge, his eyes peering over the ledge incase the boy might have fallen, but there was nothing down there that wasn't supposed to be. No bodies; no Somebodies. All at once, the idea hit him. Maybe Sora hadn't fallen; maybe in Axel's absence, he had taken his chance and finally run away. The idea sent Axel wavering to his knees, the breeze that had felt so nice against his cheeks before almost freezing the tears against his skin in a brittle, sharp few gusts. The scream was wrenched from the depths of Axel's gut, painful and hurting everywhere at once.

"ROXAS!"

XXX

There was a part of Sora that just didn't want to move; that had accepted his fate and just wanted to sleep away the days until his life was over and he wouldn't have to deal with the pain of being discarded anymore. But that other part of Sora couldn't allow that; he couldn't give up. If Axel had decided he didn't want him, then so be it; Sora would take his freedom back. Struggling to force himself to get up, Sora wiped the tears away from his eyes, despite the crushing weight in his chest that had squeezed them out in the first place. His legs were shaking, and he had no way of telling how much time had passed already.

The room he was in was completely empty, with two closed doors, each on opposite sides of each other. The walls were metallic, bolted together, and it wasn't going to be easy to get out. Where even was he? Sighing to himself, Sora shuffled over to one of the doors, leaning his weight against it as he pressed his ear against the door, trying to listen for any kinds of sounds beyond, but all he could hear was a confusing and quiet hum. Sora tried to take a small breath, his breathing shaky from the tears the continued to threaten to spill over; palming them away, he attempted to listen harder, but could hear nothing but that odd hum.

'Only one way to find out…' he thought to himself, stepping back. His knees were weak, but his spirit stronger than ever. Axel didn't want him… so he didn't need Axel, either. But something within Sora seemed to reject those words, and another wave of pure agony washed over Sora, pushing more tears out of his eyes. There was no way Axel would have just abandoned him like that. Not after last night; not after these past three years. Stepping away from the door, Sora shook his head, his hands coming to lay against his head, trying to still the rapidly tumbling thoughts within, but denial after denial swept through him.

It was a trick. It had to be. It was just some sick, stupid trick. Axel wouldn't leave him alone like this. Axel wouldn't abandon him. Axel would miss him…

Wouldn't he?

With a frustrated yell, Sora took off, slamming his shoulder against the door in an attempt to break it open, and to still the unwanted thoughts that tossed around in his head. It hurt, the collision between Sora's shoulder and the metal door, but it was nothing compared to the crushing pain inside him as the door burst open, slamming against the wall with a loud noise that threatened to deafen Sora for a moment. Sora shook his head, trying to still the bile that attempted to work its way up the back of his throat at the sudden gloom that had all but taken him over. Everything was spiraling around him, spinning enough to put Sora off balance. Sora caught onto the wall and attempted to raise his eyes, startled at the blue glare of several computer monitors staring back at him.

For a single moment, Sora stood there, almost mesmerized by the screens; there was something familiar about them… Something that Sora felt like he had seen before, even through the crushing weight that continued to weaken Sora's knees and push him toward the ground, along with the tears that just wouldn't stop falling. The hum of the computers surrounded Sora, sparking up a jolting image of himself, smashing those same screens with the keyblade. Startled, Sora backed away from the still working, completely immaculate computer screens, his eyes somewhat wide. He had never done anything like that; so why had his mind given him that image?

As Sora backed up, palming the tears from his eyes quickly, he yelped loudly as he tripped over a set of large stairs, leading up toward the next floor. Despite Sora's level of surprise, he knew he had to find some way to get out of here, and it was that singular thought alone that drove him off his ass and made his legs move, slowly bringing him up the stairs into what appeared to be a large library of sorts. The stairs weren't normal, either. It was like someone designed the room with a huge, gaping hole in it to see the metal room below. Sora could care less about the crazy people who might have lived here, though. He wanted out, and that was it.

Sora forced himself onward, through the door to the library, and found himself staring down a long hallway. Toward his left, there were more stairs, but they were decrepit and crumbling, the metal railing broken and twisted. They looked too dangerous to attempt to climb down, and the floor below him was far enough that Sora hesitated to jump, afraid of creating injury to himself. Sora's brow furrowed deeper, even as he felt more unbidden tears slip down his cheeks. In frustration, Sora swiped those tears away, and shook his head hard enough he nearly lost his balance. Gripping his head, he leant against the wall for a moment, trying as hard as he could to focus on something other than the growing ball of pure agony in his stomach, but… it just wouldn't leave him.

Stumbling forward, Sora pushed himself off the wall, trying to promise himself if he got out of here, the agony would go away. There was another staircase several yards ahead of him, but those stairs actually looked worse than the first set he had come across. The walls were somewhat crumbling in on themselves, and for a moment, Sora entertained the strange thought that he shouldn't be standing on the first floor; with the way this place was, the first floor should be on the ground floor. But oddly enough, Sora's eyes caught a glimpse of something ahead of him; a door swung wide open, half hanging off of its hinges, giving a view into an immaculate white room.

Despite Sora's previous convictions, the room seemed to somehow draw him in, a sudden spark of realization resounding through him at where he was, even though he still had no clue where this was. His breathing was somewhat laboured, his tears still streaking across his cheeks as his legs began moving slowly, on their own, toward the room. Sora attempted to reason it away, that perhaps he would find something to help him down to the ground floor in that room, but he doubted if any part of him thought it was completely true.

Sora stepped into the white room.

XXX

"Axel?"

Axel's body couldn't even tense up at the sound of Demyx's voice. No matter what had happened, Axel just felt like he wanted to melt into the floor of the clock tower and fade away from this pitiful existence. It wasn't fair. It just wasn't-

"Axel, can you hear me?"

Axel didn't move; there wasn't even a flicker of recognition in his once shining, now dull emerald eyes. Tears stained his pale, void cheeks, where his usual purple, upside down tear drop markings normally resided. He looked… broken. For a single moment, Demyx felt a small flicker of hesitation. Did he really want to do this to Axel? That singular moment was obliterated by Axel's quiet whimper, and Demyx crouched down by his side, wrapping his arms around the red head in an attempt to comfort him. One final deep breath preceeded Demyx's cauculated words,

"... He ran away finally, didn't he?"

Axel's breath hitched, sending a fresh wave of agony crashing over him, long before the first several waves had thought to abate. Tears flowed like a river down his cheeks as his shocked form heard the words Demyx spoke to him.

"I hate to be honest with you, but everyone could see it coming. He's just not Roxas. He'll never be Roxas, and he was using you. Playing you, Axel, can't you see that? He waited until you were vulnerable; until you trusted him enough to leave him alone. Now he's gone. Just like when Roxas left, he didn't even care what you would think, did he?"

The words seemed to resonate in Axel's very core, and yet, that same core seemed to reject the thoughts horribly. He wouldn't do that, he couldn't. But... Roxas had already; left him for no real reason. And now... now Sora had followed in Roxas' footsteps and left him too. Axel's body quaked with the emotions running rampant in his head. But Demyx's words never ceased.

"I bet he didn't even say anything to you before he left. Didn't leave a note, didn't do anything but run. It's not fair to you, Axel. You shouldn't have to go through this again. Roxas hurt you once, and now Sora's trying to do it again. That's all this is; Sora wants to hurt you. He doesn't want to live with you. He never wanted to be with you, either. All he ever wanted was just to see you in pain, and you're letting him."

Axel forced his eyes to close; this couldn't be happening. This wasn't true, there was no way it could be. But with every word Demyx spoke, Axel felt his chest being crushed with the weight of guilt and horror. He'd driven Sora away; Demyx was right, Sora had never wanted to love him. From the start of his capture, Sora was probably planning on doing this all along. He probably even faked being Roxas that night. But amidst all the tears and pain and shock, Axel felt a twinge in his core; that last thought couldn't have been right. The way he had moved, the way he had spoken... there wasn't a doubt in Axel's mind it was his Roxas he had been with. So why...

"Axel, don't let him win."

Axel felt Demyx's arms slowly rubbing up and down his shoulders, hands caressing his arms through the black issued cloak they both wore, and felt something slightly familiar in the touch. A caring touch that his Roxas had used to give him, a comfort he had missed for so long now... Axel closed his eyes for a long moment, trying to reign in his thoughts, but the dam broke with Demyx's next words,

"I'll never leave you like they did."

Axel cried harder than he had ever cried before.


	7. A Reunion Of Sorts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sora, while dealing with the issues Axel's 'abandonment' pushed onto his heart, begins to learn a little more of Roxas. Meanwhile, Axel has his own way of dealing with the dilemma, but how will Demyx's interactions with him change things between his long lost love, his new found love, and his own non-existent heart?

The brightness of the immaculate room was at war with the way the rest of the building had looked. Nothing was out of place in this room, save for the door that swung slightly off its hinges, loose and looking able to collapse at any moment. But the inside of the room in the dilapidated building wasn't near as striking to Sora as the actual items within. The room was large, with nothing but a single, rectangular table with two chairs at opposite ends of each other. Paper littered the floors and walls, each with drawings upon them; disturbing, somehow familiar drawings there was no way existed. Sora was frozen for a moment in the doorway, seeing pictures of himself and Kairi, of friends he'd been forced to leave behind three years ago, of places he'd been and things he'd seen... there was no way.

Around him, it was almost as though the pictures moved for a moment; the pages flickered and the images distorted themselves strangely, like a video game that messed up for a few moments, but managed to right itself quickly. The flicker was strange to say the least, but with the crushing weight of the pain that had saddled his heart and stomach, Sora didn't pay as much attention to it as he might have in any other situation. He stumbled inward, toward the table, where papers cluttered the pristine white cloth covering the table itself. He felt a few more tears trail unbidden down his cheeks that he didn't bother to wipe away, staring down at a picture through watery eyes.

Out of every picture here, the ones on the table confused him the most; the rest of the pictures were of him or things he knew, but every picture upon the table was of himself in an Organization XIII cloak. His hair was wrong, a lighter colour, and in almost every picture, he was standing next to Axel or another Organization member. Sora's head pounded; who would draw these pictures? Who knew Sora well enough to know everywhere he went, and why did they draw him as an Organization member? Another tear rolled down Sora's cheek as he stood, leaning onto the table, looking at a particular picture of himself and Axel. Axel was off in the distance, his arms out to his sides, looking like he was yelling at Sora, who was walking off.

\-- "No one will miss me." --

Sora's hands shot to his head, which suddenly felt like it was about to implode on itself. A loud screeching sound formed behind his ears, blotting out all other sounds as Sora gritted his teeth. He couldn't hear anything, but those words... they rung in his mind like a thousand mockingbirds taunting him, giving him a riddle they knew he couldn't solve. Sora felt his knees go weak; he knew he had closed his eyes, and he couldn't see the picture anymore, but the image was burned into his mind, scarring the backs of his eyelids with a terrible scene that took on motion.

\-- Sora's heart lurched with feelings of abandonment and betrayal, of hopelessness and fear; he could feel each tear as it slid down his cheeks as vividly as he could feel the rain penetrating his cloak. Each step was agonizing, a loud thunk and an occasional splash accompanying every step forward, away from the red head behind him. He had to know. … What did he need to know? Some bit of information, something that plagued his heart, that broiled in his stomach and made him continue walking, even when he heard the voice of a very familiar male behind him;

"You get on their bad side, and they'll destroy you!"

Grief spread through his entire being, making it hard to move, but he forced himself. Forced one foot in front of the other, and forced the words—the lies—from his lips.

"No one will miss me."

He felt it as soon as the sound had left the air; heartbreak. His, and Axel's; with those words, he had detached himself from the only person who had ever truly made him feel alive, or that life had been worth living. But they couldn't be taken back, now. Those were words they both had to live with. And maybe it was for the best, too. Soon enough, Axel would forget about him, he would continue on with the organization, and live his own life his way. So when Axel's whispered words faintly found Sora's ears, he almost lost his resolve; almost lost his will; almost turned back.

"That's not true… I will…"

But just as the rain continued to drench him, Sora continued on, into the darkness. --

Sora slowly opened his eyes, the brightness of the room forcing him to wince and close his eyes again, but the images were gone, now. The words having left his ears, leaving him in a stark silence in the white room, Sora breathed out as if he had held his breath this entire time. How could this be? It was his memory, but it wasn't his memory! He had never met Axel before being kidnapped, but this was clearly the memory of someone who knew him well, who had been a friend, or maybe more, and—

Roxas. Axel had been telling the truth the entire time, and Sora had been too blind to figure it out. He hated what Axel did to him, but all during it, his body moved with a will of its own, like it was enjoying a treat long forgotten about. The random, snarky comments that spilled from his lips when he wasn't even thinking about it, the looks he had evidently given Axel… all of it… was Roxas?

~ * X * ~ . ~ * X ~ * . ~ * X * ~

There was pain in his chest. A deep, saturating pain that crept in through every crevice, through every fault of his mind and body, settling its home in his core. He couldn't sleep, wouldn't eat. Refused to leave his room, even. Nothing mattered. He didn't want it to matter. Nothing existed but his pain. Pure, agonizing, soul-shattering pain. Roxas… Sora… they were both gone. Never to return, never again to smile or scowl at him. Never again to joke around with, nevermore to love.

Had they ever really loved him? Or was Demyx right, and did they just use him? A means to an end, an escape method. A plan. The pain in his chest constricted.

Axel blinked away the last vestiges of tonight's tears, staring up at the ceiling. He laid on the floor beside the bed he and Roxas, and even Sora, had once shared. He couldn't touch it; couldn't get near it without their memory resounding within him, tearing him apart. He didn't deserve the comfort of the mattress, didn't want the warmth of the blankets. He was a monster, and Sora had shown him that far too often for it not to be true. Why else would he have run away?

His back ached, but the pain he felt in his physical body was only a fraction of the turmoil in his head. He felt alone; much more alone than when he'd had hope of finding his Roxas, severely more alone than when he left Sora after every attempt to make Roxas show himself. Lonely; so very lonely, with only his tears and memories to keep him company.

But soon, those would fade. Demyx had assured him that his tears would eventually dry, and the memories so vivid in his mind now, would begin to dull. Fade into nothingness; blackness. Forgetfulness. Was that really what he wanted? … Was that really what Roxas wanted? Or Sora?

Time was passing, but Axel had no way to tell what time it was. Was it morning-'Mornings are horrible, Axel. Get out of my face.'-or night-'Good night, sweet Prince.'? Or, had time truly stopped for a broken, non-existent heart?

"Axel?"

His body lept from its laying position, a yelp of anticipation rising like bile in his throat, his mind creating the image for him: Roxas, standing in the doorway, looking exactly as he had the night he left. Blue eyes focused on Axel lovingly, arms open for a welcome home hug.

What stood in the door was Demyx.

~ * X * ~ . ~ * X ~ * . ~ * X * ~

Demyx watched as Axel jolted at the sound of his voice; for a moment, he thought he had gotten through to him, finally. That Axel had left Sora in the past and was ready to accept him, but the sudden dullness in what used to be sparkling emerald eyes, and the pronounced slump to his shoulders told Demyx he still had more work to do. He sighed quietly, stepping through the threshold of the room, balancing two steaming cups of jasmine tea and a plate of biscuits in his hands. It had been worrying him, how Axel had been refusing to eat or sleep, and that he even refused to touch the bed anymore, but Demyx hoped to fix that soon.

All he needed to do was exactly what Roxas and Sora had failed to do; be a friend as much as a lover. Placing the biscuits and the tea in front of Axel, Demyx took up his own cup and sipped from it, watching Axel over the rim of his glass. Axel didn't bother to look at him, or the food and drink placed before him. His eyes were red rimmed from tears, and the purple marks on his face hadn't been replaced yet, leaving his cheeks bare, but they weren't wet at all. Demyx felt a tiny sliver of satisfaction run through him; his predictions were already coming true.

"You're not crying anymore." Demyx pointed out, making Axel flinch.

As much as Axel's cringe made Demyx rethink his plan of attack, he took a deep breath and forced him to continue on with the words. All the better for the both of them, he told himself.

"It's hard to cry over something you never really had in the first place, isn't it?" this earned him a glance from Axel; a timid, wondering look that urged Demyx to continue, "You can't lose a love that was never given, Axel. Roxas and Sora… the only thing that was on their minds was a way to escape our Organization. They were never committed; they never wanted to be."

Axel's gaze flickered down to his lap, where he folded his hands tightly against each other. Demyx watched sadly as Axel's knuckles turned white from the pressure exerted.

"You have friends you've ignored, Axel," he went on, "People you've pushed aside in your pursuit of them. We're all still here for you. I'm still here for you. But you need to open your eyes and see that. You've been blinded by the past for too long."

Demyx paused, wondering if anything he was saying was even getting through his fiery red-head. He knew that he couldn't expect anything drastic to happen within the first few days, or even within the first few weeks. Patience was the name of his game, but he had to show he was right here every step of the way; show just how different he was from Axel's past mistakes. So that's why it surprised him when Axel finally reached out a hand to grasp one of the biscuits. He never made eye contact with Demyx, didn't straighten his shoulders, and wouldn't say a word. But as he raised the food to his lips, Demyx found himself smiling slightly.

Progress was already being made.

~ * X * ~ . ~ * X ~ * . ~ * X * ~

Sora wandered along the decaying second floor, no longer searching for a way down, or out. His hands aimlessly stroked the walls as he shifted past, his mind ablaze with thoughts and memories. Some of those memories reminded him of the pain he had endured during his captivity, the fright and agony of his situation, and other memories only furthered the searing pain gnawing at his heart, clutching his lungs and dragging pained whimpers from his lips. His entire body hurt, somehow physically, from emotional pain. It made it hard to move, to even think, but he couldn't stop. He couldn't give in to the pain or rejection, no matter how Axel had decided he… didn't… want him.

**"We need to talk."**

Sora jumped, twisting around despite the sudden throbbing headache he faced. No one was behind him, no evidence left there was anyone in the abandoned mansion besides him. But that screeching noise he heard before, right before he had glimpsed one of Roxas' memories, when he had blacked out in that white room, began to creep up on him again. It started as a distant sound, becoming clearer and more devastating as it drew near; Sora covered his ears with his hands, trying to drown out the piercing noise, but it seemed to reverberate around his entire body, sending jitters up and down his spine. His knees quaked, then gave, sending him sprawling to the floor. Dimly, he was aware as he crashed into the floor, that a heavier, more threatening quake began, the splintering sound of rotted wood barely making it through the screeching sounds.

By the time Sora had no choice but to surrender to the sound, he was falling.

Falling.

~ * X * ~ . ~ * X ~ * . ~ * X * ~

Falling?

Sora stood on nothing, with no floor beneath him, no roof above him, and nothing but pure white around him. He swallowed, his breath heavy as he spun in place, trying to figure out what was going on. Was this another memory? He felt something brush his shoulder; a hand, it felt like. As he turned his head toward the feeling, pain flashed through his face and up his nose, making him cry out. His voice echoed as he fell backward, landing without landing; floating.

It was hard to get his feet under him, to stand on nothing, but Sora tried, his eyes opening to meet... himself? The idea gave him pause, and at any other point in his life, Sora might have instantly decided that it was a dream, not to be paid attention to. Hadn't he had dreams similar to this in the past?

But now, holding his nose and feeling a thin, sticky liquid slowly flowing out of his nose, looking up at the boy who looked so similar to himself, it was creepy… his thoughts went to Roxas. And just as soon as they did, the male smirked.

 **"Yep."** was his only response; but response to what?


End file.
